Snowflakes
by BrokenKeyBlade
Summary: After going through a devastating tragedy, Jack's parents decide to move to Burgess for his "well being". Jamie's lived there all his life. The two meet at Burgess High School, and Jamie can't help but notice the new boy with snow white hair. How does he help Jack? By being the first person to really see him. AU JackxJamie
1. Chapter 1

**Yes. I've submitted to Rise of the Guardians mania. And I love it. So, I had my friend read this, and he said Jack is a bit OOC. But hey, we love angsty Jack, right? So, uh, read, love, give it a chance, follow, favorite, review even? This'll be a long story, I can feel it :) And I'm excited**

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Jack Frost didn't believe in simple, easy fixes. Ever since he was a young child, before anything bad had ever happened to him, he thought it was nonsense and never ran away from a fight or a problem. He either tackled dilemmas head on, or let them settle under his skin, but never turned his back to them. Not like his parents were making him do. Making him run away from what troubled him. He tried to tell them that it wouldn't work; that leaving wouldn't magically dissipate his wrongdoings and that he'd always keep what he did in his cold hands. They wouldn't listen and insisted that a "change of scenery" would do him good. Maybe his grades would go up? Maybe he'd make some new friends? And maybe... well, just maybe he'd forget.

It was a big load of bull.

Don't get him wrong, Jack's parents were understanding enough. But parents could only connect so much to a troubled teenager, and emotional and mental levels are usually not shared between parent and child. It had been a long process for them to start feeling slightly normal, but Jack had never gotten over it. Mr. and Mrs. Frost still had their days where getting out of bed seemed impossible, and their lives had certainly turned upside down. It seemed perfectly logical that moving to a new, small town would be a good healing process for their son and for them too. Their family had suffered tremendously. A breath of fresh, unburdened air was just what they needed.

They had moved from a two story, three bedroom house in the countryside to a two bedroom, one story house in a suburb with yellow paint and rose bushes in the front yard. It had two bathrooms, a spacious living room with blue carpet, and Jack's room had two windows that kept it brightly lit. The first thing he did was unpack his curtains and shut out the sunshine. It was an especially warm summer, a season Jack never much cared for, and his mood had dampened from angsty to downright miserable. He had been in Burgess for three weeks, just enough time to unpack his most important items and get enrolled in Burgess High School and get his new school supplies, which now were thrown carelessly in the corner of his room, him dreading to organize them for school that Monday. His third year of high school in a new town. He was only vaguely excited to see what type of art classes he'd be able to take and the types of resources that would be there for him to experiment with. The closest he'd been to touching a paintbrush recently was when he unpacked them four days ago, but hadn't gotten a chance to actually _use _them. He was feeling antsy. His fingers were itching to paint, but his canvases were dug deep into some unpacked boxes in the garage, and he didn't want to ask his dad to go get them.

His body was aching for a cigarette too, but he saved those for his alone time in the woods. To keep both of his addictions at bay, he settled with drawing until he couldn't tell what was real and what was art. When school started and everything was unpacked, he'd try to relax and have his zen time. Just two days. Two days and he'd be subjected to hormonal teenagers at a whole new place and be ignored and invisible like he'd been for the past three years of his life. He hated nothing more than being invisible.

But there were some things you couldn't change in life. Like some people are just born athletic, or popular, he was born translucent. Not literally, of course, but sometimes he did look down at himself to see if he was still there. He had a knack for blending in, a knack that he didn't highly value. You'd think a teenager like him would want to disappear into the crowd. But that wasn't the case one bit. All he wanted was to be noticed and appreciated and _looked at_, like he was at least worth _something_. Hell, he even dyed his hair a blindingly bright shade of snow white and wore iridescent blue contacts. He was desperate. Even with his incredibly noticeable appearance, people's eyes skirted over him. And it wasn't like he was unattractive, or short.

Jack padded to his closest window and pushed back the blinds. It was eight in the evening, but as he touched the glass, it was still heated from the afternoon sun beating down. His fingertips warmed slightly, an altogether unfamiliar sensation, and he drew them back and to his chest. They went back to their usual temperature; a chilly, uncomfortable state. He shivered and quickly snatched his hoodie off of his bed and tugged it over his head. He was often cold, his hands and feet always freezing and he disliked, but also cherished, the feeling. He rubbed his eyes a bit and yawned. It was still early, but moving across the state had taken a toll on his body. He decided that he'd draw for a few hours before submitting to his drowsiness.

His sketch book was on the top drawer of his desk, right next to his tin box that contained some of his tangible secrets. He quickly retrieved what he wanted and flopped onto his bed. For the longest time he just stared at the blank page. Getting frustrated, he snapped it shut and tossed it onto a pile of clothes by his bed. With a fluid motion, he clicked his lamp off and tugged his blanket up to his chin. Who said you had to stay up late on the weekends?

And if anyone did, it's not like they talked to him.

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**If you're a little on the fence about this story, I swear it gets better. Even I didn't really like how this chapter came out.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Oh. My. God. You guys are AMAZING. Flat out amazing. My e-mail was practically blowing up from the follows, favorites, and my personal favorite, reviews :) (though I do extremely appreciate the others. I just like to know what you guys thing, what you might want, ect.) I love each and every one of you.**

**Shout out to!**

**Silver Wolf**

**Mallory Mirkov**

**DarkAliceInWonderland21**

**The Emcee (if you want to read more RofG fanfics, check them out. I haven't gotten the chance to read any yet, but they sound interesting :) )**

**AkumaSherr**

**Soul-Whisperer**

**And a few other Guests unnamed.**

**Thanks so much. You inspired me to get writing and pushing out this chapter quickly. Sorry if I missed anyone or if I spelled your name wrong. And thanks to the others who added me and this story. I love ya :')**

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Jack woke to the sound of his alarm, chiming precisely at 6:00, just like he had set it the night before. He groaned loudly and slammed it with his fist, successfully shutting it off without breaking it. With a distressed sigh, he sat up slowly and rubbed his eyes with a yawn. The day had arrived. First day of Junior year at Burgess High School. Fantastic.

He pushed back his covers and swung his legs over the side of his bed. With one last stretch, he got up and made his way to the bathroom. Half awake, he turned on the shower to a slightly cold spray and stripped his clothes off, stepped in, and just stood in the middle of the water, letting it cascade down his face with closed eyes. He loved his morning showers, but couldn't stay in for too long because his mother specifically told him to not use up all the hot water(like he used much) because his father and her had to get ready too. He washed quickly and exited, wrapping a towel around his waist and using another to dry his hair. He glanced at the mirror and cursed. Fumbling with the doorknob, he burst into his room to collect his contacts and ran back into the bathroom before anyone could claim it. Soon enough, he had bright blue eyes and finally looked at himself without contempt. _Alright. I'm acceptable looking now. _

He dressed in his usual clothes: a plain T-shirt, brown pants that looked a bit to small, and, of course, his signature blue hoodie. He made sure the sleeves were pulled down to his wrists and hauled his bag off the floor before heading to the living room. No one had woken up yet, so he enjoyed a short moment of silence before remembering with a start that he had forgotten to grab something. After fetching it from his drawer, he glanced at his phone and decided he'd walk to the bus stop now. After quietly slipping out the door and locking it, he walked down the street until he saw three other teenagers on a corner. There was a pair of twins, each listening to their music devices, and a beefy girl with short brown hair who look absolutely enraptured with a book titled _Horses of the Past_. They didn't budge an inch when he came up. How very typical.

The bus arrived shortly and Jack took a seat near the middle. The whole bus ride, despite it getting rather crowded, no one sat next to him or even glanced his way. He tried to not let it get to him and decided to preoccupy himself with his schedule. The school was rather odd, running on days named 'A' and 'B'. Each one had four periods to it, each lasting over an hour. A plus to it, though, was that they had an hour long lunch. For the A day that Jack had ahead of him, American History was the first one. Then Algebra 2, lunch, Intermediate Painting(which he was _only _looking forward to out of his whole day), and then English. Not the best day, but it had his favorite medium. His next day, though(the B day), consisted of Intermediate Drawing, Beginning Sculpture, Beginning Ceramics, and a Forensic Science class which actually sounded particularly interesting to him.

After arriving at the school, he was instructed with a letter in the mail to go to the office with his contact information and they'd input his information in the computer, introduce him to the councilor, and give him a map of the campus. On first impression, it was bigger than his old school, but only for the fact that his last school had a grand total of 146 students. This one had approximately 550 students. It also looked like an old school that had had some remodeling over the past thirty years, with patches of chipped brick poking under newer walls and bars of metal and nice windows that must've been rather new. The grounds weren't too large, but still well kept and had many trees and flowers lining the fence that stated the boundaries. Behind the school was a rather dense forest area with tall old trees and a railroad that marked the opposite edge of the forest. Inside the school, the main hall was painted a light blue and the office was right on the left of the entrance with glass doors and a wall made mostly of windows. He entered it and walked up to the desk. The receptionist was currently talking on the phone, and she held up a finger to tell him she'd be "one minute". He nodded politely and took a step back to retrieve his papers. After several moments filled with her murmurs on the phone, she hung up and smiled at him.

"Hello. How could I help you, dear?" She crossed her arms on the desk and leaned forward.

"I was told to give you these." He said and offered the contact sheets to her, which she took with her left hand and looked at.

"Oh, yes. You're Mr. Frost. Welcome to Burgess." She smiled sweetly at him, and Jack noticed she had a lot of smile wrinkles around her mouth and chocolate brown eyes.

"Thank you," he said and gave a half smile.

"Well, here's your map," she said while pulling out a sheet of paper from a drawer, "and I'm sorry to tell you that Mrs. Kelly isn't here quite yet. She's the counselor. But whenever you need to talk about classes or college, just pop on by and make an appointment, okay?"

Jack nodded again.

"Got any questions or concerns, dear?"

He shook his head.

"Well, don't be shy if you need anything." She gave him another smile before taking his paper and typing up the contents into the computer.

He exited the office and looked at his map. The first class was upstairs in room A 204. The one after that, room E 105. And his art classes; room B 113. He only really cared about them. He quickly found a hallway that was void of students chatting after months of not seeing each other, talking about all the places they went, what classes they had with who, and how much they hated waking up early. He slid down the wall onto his butt and rested his head against the wall and closed his eye for a few seconds. After, he pulled his sketch book out of his bag and began to doodle until the bell rang and he decided he'd walk upstairs and meet Mr. Colson for a thrilling hour+ of history.

The period went by rather slow. He kept his head down in the back of the room, hunched over his pencil and drawing paper for most of the time, only raising his head to take the syllabus from the girl who sat in front of him and when the teacher's aide passed out the textbooks. He ended up filling two pages, front to back, before having to shuffle to Algebra, and repeating what he had gone through the last period, but this time filling two and a half pages. After the bell rang, half of the school, him included, were allowed to eat. Since he didn't much care for eating at school, he decided to tour the grounds before his first _real_ class of the day. The grass was well groomed and perfectly green. Too bright and almost fake looking to him. He walked around to the back of the school, using a stick he found to drag against the fence like a bored child, one hand in his hoodie pocket. He wasn't paying much attention to his surroundings until the _tink-tink-tink _of the fence stopped abruptly. He backtracked and noticed that a good three feet wide gap was missing from it. With a glance at his phone, he decided that he had enough time to go exploring in the little forest before having to rush back.

He crouched down a bit to slip through the gap and yanked his bag to unhook it from where it caught on the ragged metal. Straightening up, he took one last glance around the perimeter to see if anyone was watching him. There was no one in sight. Perfect.

He went into the safe cover of the trees and felt the change of temperature. It was much darker under the thick foliage of leaves, and he felt much better about this town. There wasn't a good safe place at his old school. After walking for several minutes, he stopped and kneeled down to dig through his bag until he found what he had been looking forward to(second to his painting class) since he walked onto the bus.

He stuck the cigarette between his lips while trying to fish out his lighter from his front pocket. With a grin, he pulled it out and flicked it on. It had been his favorite lighter since he got it a year ago. It was light blue with snowflakes on it. It was odd for a lighter, considering the appearance contradicted and clashed with the contents, but that's what he loved most about it.

He brought it to the tip of the cigarette and inhaled. It caught and he happily sucked in a lungful of smoke. He could feel it lazily travel down his throat and warm him up from the inside. It was fucking _beautiful_. People didn't understand smoking. Even some people who smoked didn't understand it. It was _art_. It was art that filled you up, got you warm, and expelled from the depths of you. It saw you, got close to your heart, and kissed the inside of your mouth. When it departed from your lips, it made beautiful clouds and he swore he could see his very _soul_ reflected in it's tendrils.

He took ten minutes to savor the feeling and slipped in to his zen mode. He closed his eyes and held the smoke inside him and blew it slowly from in between his lips, barely opening them. When he finished it, he took out his phone only to realize that the bell had rang seven minutes ago.

"Fantastic," He mumbled and snatched his bag from the ground and brushed it off a bit before sprinting to the hole in the fence. He didn't stop running until he was right in front of the door. With a hung head, he slowly opened it and silently begged that the teacher wouldn't yell at him. Thankfully, the class was already in a hustle instead of how his other classes had gone about. Some were walking back and forth, getting paint from the table at the front of the room. Most were chatting among themselves; laughing and smearing paint on each other while the teacher wasn't looking.

Speaking of, the teacher was currently walking towards him. He was of medium height with short cropped black hair and dark brown eyes.

"Get lost?" He asked and smiled.

Jack shrugged and nodded.

"Well, welcome, new student, to Painting." He gestured around with both hands. "You're name's Jackson, right? First year here?"

"It's Jack," He said. "I prefer Jack. And yes."

"Jack, okay, I'll try to remember that. Well, a lot of the kids here already know where the stuff is. I guess I could show you around and tell you what's up for this year." He clapped his hand on the teen's back and started to walk forward.

Across the room, a certain Jamie Bennett had perked up his head when he heard Mr. Reyes talking. To his surprise, the person he was talking to was a complete stranger. Strangers were not common to Burgess. Everyone who lived there had lived there since they were little. Jamie stood up to get a better look at the new kid. The most notable feature of his was a shock of white hair. Also, he was rather tall and skinny. He didn't look like he belonged there at all. And for some reason, Jamie felt himself wanting to get to know him. Not just because he was different and new and looked rather lonely. There was something else. Something he couldn't put his finger on.

He quickly got up and made his way over. He had never been a really shy person. Occasionally reserved, but mostly open and all smiles.

"Hey Mr. Reyes," he greeted with a little wave. He hadn't gotten to say hello to him since the period started, so in a way he was killing two birds with one stone.

"Hey Jamie," He said with a smile. "How's it been going?"

"Pretty good. Had a nice summer."

"Great! Oh, pardon my manners, this is Jack." He patted his back and smiled.

"Hey, I'm Jamie." He said and stuck out his hand to shake. Jack hesitated before taking it and giving a slightly loose shake. Jamie looked back at Mr. Reyes. "I could show him around the room if you want? And tell him what we're doing."

The man clapped his hands together. "That'd be great. What do you say, Jack?"

The teen shrugged. "Yeah, okay."

"Jamie's a good kid. You guys'll get along swimmingly." He looked over to the table by the window and saw one of the girls waving her hand in the air. "If you need me, just ask." He said to Jack before walking over to her.

"Okay, so, the cabinet right here is for sculpture class," He patted the grey one that was right next to them. "So, we'll skip that."

Jack almost wanted to tell him that he was in that class, but the other boy had already started walking towards the front of the room.

"These two are for painting and drawing." He opened it up. "It's got extra paint, obviously, and paintbrushes. I don't recommend using them because they're old and crusty because kids don't like cleaning them. The top shelf has rulers and scissors. The bottom one has sketchbooks, but we don't use them in here. The shelves right in that corner have all the premade canvases and watercolor paper." He moved over to the second one.

"Here's the gesso and gloss medium, plus the big brushes. Oh, and the trays. He keeps a lot of examples in this cabinet, so you probably won't use it alot On that table over there in the front he sets out the paint and the trays and stuff, but you have to put the trays you use back into the cabinet. Okay, all the way over here we have are storage cabinets. It's just a free for all, so you can put your crap wherever. This one is for third period. Back in this corner we have the sinks. Mr. Reyes doesn't like it when they get messy, so don't let paint sit around and always clean the brushes." Jamie finished with a satisfied nod of his head. "I think that's it. Got it?"

Jack looked around the room and slowly nodded his head.

"Yeah, I think I got it."

"Cool. C'mon, I'll tell you what we're doing."

He walked back to his table, which didn't have anyone else at it. The class was rather small, actually, but the room was big enough to keep it from being crowded, even if they had ten more students. Jack followed him and stood at the chair across Jamie until the brown haired boy gestured at it. Jack slowly slid into the seat.

The rest of the class went by rather fast. Jamie explained the assignment to Jack, letting him borrow his paintbrushes that were much better than the one available there, and kept chatting through the whole period. He was amazed at Jack's talent. Even with the simple start of the year assignment, his skill couldn't help but show.

"Oh, uh, thanks," Jack has said rather modestly as Jamie complimented him at how perfectly the paint was blended together.

"I'm not very artsy myself," Jamie admitted. "I've been taking the painting class just for an easy B."

"Isn't the saying 'an easy A'?" Jack asked with a little smile.

"Not with the way I paint." Jamie said and chuckled.

Jack actually laughed for the first time in months. He caught himself in surprise and looked confused for a second before Jamie started talking again.

"But actually, Mr. Reyes is a really awesome teacher. He cares about his students."

Jack glanced out of the corner of his eye to look at the man. He was talking avidly to one of the students, before laughing loudly and high-fiving him.

Jack smiled and looked back at the brown haired teen. Jamie grinned and went back to his painting, but kept chatting.

When the bell rang, Jack was extremely disappointed. Even though the classes were longer than he was used to, it wasn't enough. He hadn't painted in forever and art was kind of his thing. Also, he actually really enjoyed talking to Jamie. He hadn't realized how fantastic it was to talk to someone. He hadn't realized how lonely he really was.

And probably the weirdest, yet most amazing, thing he had experienced his first day was that Jamie actually _noticed_ him. And appeared to enjoy talking to him. For once he was seen.

Jack could cry.

But he stuck with smiling like an idiot every time he thought about how awesome third period was.

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**WARNING! Don't let my description of smoking effect your opinion about it, okay? Just because Jack likes it, DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD DO IT! Jack's being an angsty bad boy. Don't be a monkey see monkey do? Stay safe, my friends**


	3. Chapter 3

**Not very long, but I wanted to get it out there. Not too happy with it, but I like the end :) I don't know if I'm going too fast, or too slow, or just right... Anyway, you guys are still freaking amazing.**

**Shout out to!**

**Alluring Alliteration**

**Soul-Whisperer**

**AkumaSherr (yes, your name's in it again :))**

**The Emcee**

**Tenshi Yami-Angel of Darkness**

** Aaaaanddddd...**

**Ice Flake 77! My god. This chapter is dedicated to you. Your review made my smile like crazy and I was ranting about how much I love you to my friend this morning. To answer your question, no, I do not smoke. I HAVE, though, smoked before. Twice to be exact, haha. It was purely for 'educational' or writing purposes. I just wanted to make it more real. Anyway, you're awesome. I love you. **

**And everyone else who followed and favorited. I love you too!**

**Also, I don't own Rise of the Guardians... I never do a disclaimer. Are we obliged by law to?**

**NOTE:I changed one thing last chapter. P.E. is now English. Because who doesn't have an English class? I feel better now. **

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Even English didn't damper Jack's mood. He hadn't felt this good since... Well, since he was fifteen. For two years he had lived with a dark, ugly cloud over him. Jamie... Jamie made him feel welcomed and even a little important. Jack felt happy. Jack felt not so invisible. Jack went home and smiled at his surprised parents before walking into his room, tossing his bag on his chair, and flopping on his bed. He grinned at the ceiling and ran his fingers through his hair.

Overall, it was the best first day of school he'd had in a long time. Maybe since forever.

At 6:30, his mom, Anna, called him in for dinner. The kitchen still had cardboard boxes with plates, glasses, silverware, and his mom's horrendous cow themed kitchen decorations. She had cooked vegetarian lasagna, Jack's personal favorite, and served it to him on a white plate with little yellow flowers painted around the rim; something he made when he was thirteen and didn't quite know how talented he actually was. He looked at it and smiled before looking up at his mom.

"Thanks," he said and took a bite.

"Of course sweetie." She sat down and glanced at his dad. Mark was reading an article and she cleared her throat. "Ahem."

He looked up with a start and set it down. "Sorry."

"Well, how was your first day?" She asked.

"Actually, it was pretty good." He said after swallowing. "No shootings. No drug crackdowns."

"Jack," his mom warned half heartedly. Honestly, she was just glad he wasn't glaring at his plate. He was eating with a pleasant look on his face. His eyes, though not his natural shade, still had a little glimmer in them. Like they used to.

He grinned at her tone and took another fork full. "How was work?" He asked.

"Oh, you know. Like the old branch. But here." She said.

"I typed on the computer." His dad said. "Spilled some coffee on my pants."

Jack chuckled and Anna swore she felt her heart grow two sizes.

"So, what were your classes today?"

"History, Math, English. But I had my painting class, and that was awesome."

"Do you like your teachers?"

"Mr. Reyes, the art teacher, he's the only one that really made any impression. He's pretty cool. I've got him twice tomorrow."

"I still think it's strange how your school's schedule is." She said. She didn't really have that much of an opposition to it, she just wanted to keep talking to her son.

"It's actually nice. Unless you absolutely hate your class." He finished his plate, but still stayed.

"Meet anyone?" She asked cautiously. She knew he got touchy with that, but she figured that, since it was a new town, people would be open. They wouldn't know. People wouldn't judge him about what happened or how he acted after.

"Yeah. I did." He smiled and got up to put his dishes away.

"Oh," she said, surprised. "Oh, well, yes? What's their name?"

"Jamie. We have Painting together."

"Ooh, a girl." His dad chimed in. "Is she pretty?"

"Dad, Jamie's a boy." He chuckled and shook his head.

Anna laughed and patted her husband's arm. "He's nice?" She asked.

"Yeah. He showed me around and we talked." He yawned. "You know, I think I'll go to bed early. 'Night."

"Goodnight, love you."

"Love you, too," he called out from the hall.

"Love you too, son! Jeez," his father said.

"Goodnight, dad!"

Mark chuckled and looked at Anna.

"This was a good idea. It's only been a day, but I can tell he's so much better." She said and hugged him around the shoulders. He agreed.

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Jack's second day of school was good. It was good. Not great. Not like the day before, but it consisted of mostly of art classes, and he'd been looking forward to experimenting with 3D art. Even though the ceramics teacher wasn't Mr. Reyes, he didn't mind her too much and mostly kept to himself. In all honesty, he just wanted it to be third period. Maybe it was all wishful thinking. Maybe Jamie was just being nice, and didn't really want to keep sitting with him, and talking with him, and laughing with him.

When the next day had risen, and after his routine pre-painting smoke, Jack walked into the classroom(on time) with a hopeful feeling inside his chest, and sweety-cold hands.

"Jack! Over here!" Jamie called out and waved his hand around. He had moved the table closer to the window.

Jack smiled and walked over. Jamie pulled out the chair enough for Jack to sit down, right next to him since the other side of the table was pressed flush to the wall.

"Why the change in view?"

"You know, as much as I love watching Caitlin trying to molest that sophomore, I like looking outside much better." They both laughed.

"No complaints from me. Oh, look at this." Jack pulled out his paintbrushes. "I came prepared."

Jamie nodded his head in approval. They spent the class finishing their mini-assignment. Jack finished his thirty minutes in, but Jamie's was still half-finished and... Well, without direction, but Jack kept his mouth shut.

"So, how long have you been here for?" Jamie asked.

"A little less than a month."

"Been around town much? It's not very big but we've got some nice spots."

"No, I've been really, uh, focused on moving in."

"Mmm," Jamie mused and sat down his brush. "Wanna hang out sometime? There's this coffee shop downtown that I think you'd like."

"Oh," Jack stared, "yeah. Yeah, that sounds awesome." He tried not to sound too eager. I mean, teens hung out with each other all the time. He wanted to seem normal. Hanging out? Psh, he did that all the time.

"Here, put your number in." He pulled out his phone and offered it to Jack. "Can I see your phone?" They swapped numbers, and Jack felt sort of giddy when he took his phone back.

"I don't really care much for coffee, but they've got a lot of good stuff to eat and drink and stuff."

After the bell rang and Jack had to go to English, he couldn't stop thinking about how Jamie would feel about him in a non school atmosphere. Sometimes people aren't who you think they are when you get to know them. Jack knew that. Anyone who's ever made a friend knows that. And Jack used to _have_ friends.

Friday came soon enough, and Jamie had still talked and laughed and joked and Jack and him slowly started to sit with each other at lunch. Jack's brain vaguely gave him a thought of missing cigarettes, but he didn't think much about it when Jamie would comment about how ridiculous the new mural in E building was. When school had gotten out for the weekend, Jack was painting with his freshly unpacked canvases until four when Jamie texted him.

He set his brush in the jar of water before snatching up his cell and grinning.

_hey feelin up 2 goin to coffee cave?_

He waited a minute before responding so he didn't seem too desperate.

_Yeah, sure. Where is it?_

_main st. ill stand outside so u know_

_Okay. See you soon._

Jack slipped it in his pocket before grabbing his hoodie off the chair and tugging it over his head and rushing out the door.

"Mom, dad, I'm going out!" He called into the kitchen.

"Wait, wait, wait, kiddo." His dad said. "Come in here for a minute." Jack sighed like a true teenager and walked in.

"Yeah?"

"Where're you going?"

"To a coffee shop. It's just downtown. Jamie wanted me to meet up with him."

His mom smiled, very pleased.

"Will you be home for dinner?"

"Uh, I don't know. Maybe not." Jack bit his lip. "So, can I go now?"

"No," his dad stood and pulled up his belt.

Jack looked at his mom for help and could feel the disappointment sinking in.

"You have to take this first." He pulled out his wallet and gave him a twenty. "Just if you guys decide to grab something to eat."

Jack smirked and took the bill. "Thanks, dad."

"Have fun, sweetie." His mom said and nudged him out.

"'Bye!"

Jack spotted him right when he turned on to Main Street.

"Yo, Jackie!" He called out and waved him over. Jack quickly walked until he was beside him, and Jamie grinned. "Welcome to The Coffee Cave!" He gestured to the building, which looked very much like a cheap clothing store.

"This is a coffee shop?" Jack asked with a quirked eyebrow.

"No, it's on the side." Jamie punched him lightly on the shoulder. "C'mon, Jack. Keep up."

Jack chuckled and followed him to the side of the building, where, set back enough to not notice if you were walking down Main, was steps leading to a door.

"A lot of college students come here because it makes them feel cool." Jamie said as he walked in. It was now empty except for a little room to the left and the cashier who was cleaning a table.

"Well, I think this place looks cool," Jack commented. The walls were painted like a starry night and many canvas paintings were hanging on the walls. The left side of the room was all brick and the furniture didn't match each other, but still managed to look nice.

"Yeah. I thought you'd like it."

They each ordered a drink and Jamie insisted that Jack should try the coffee cake, so he bought a square. They had stayed there for an hour before Jack mentioned that his family was going to paint their kitchen and livingroom.

"Oh, that sounds fun."

"I love painting. Just not walls." Jack sipped at his drink.

"If you need any help, I can always, you know, help." He offered.

Jack's heartbeat quickened. He didn't know if it was nervousness or anxiety. His anxiety had sort of gone away. Maybe it was coming back.

"I... I think that'd be cool."

"Cool. So, tomorrow then?"

"Yeah, it's a date."

They stayed until six, just talking and Jack learned a bit more about his new friend. He had a special place in his heart for mythology. His mom was the receptionist that Jack talked to the first day of school. His parents were divorced. But something that stuck with Jack was that he had a little sister named Sophie.

"How old is she?" He asked hesitantly.

"She's eight. I love her, but she's just so all over the place. I've never met a kid with so much energy."

Jack bit his lip hard.

"Oh. That's nice." He said stiffly.

Jamie sensed something was off, so he directed the conversation away.

They both decided to order a sandwich before leaving for the night and taking off to their designated houses.

Jamie waved as Jack walked down the street and turned the corner. He smiled to himself and walked home with it plastered to his face. He hadn't had that much fun since his best friend moved that summer. The past few months had been lonely for him. Maybe he was being a little selfish, I mean, did Jack really want to spend time with him? Was he just feeling like the weird new kid who didn't know anyone yet but then he'd get really popular and leave the first guy to show him kindness?

_Oh, come on. Jack's cool, he wouldn't do that. _

Jamie waved to his mom as he walked through the door and went into his room. He shrugged off his jacket, let it fall to the floor, and layed on his bed, resting on his elbows. He was still smiling. Jack was really something.

_God, no, Jamie. Don't do it. Please don't do it._

He dropped his head into the pillow. He had done it.


	4. Chapter 4

**I'm on a freaking role. I've NEVER updated this fast. You guys are the best fans ever.**

**This chapter isn't very long, but I guess they don't really have to be.**

**Shout out to!**

**AmiiStarr (mwahaha, I have converted you)**

**Tenshi Yami-Angel of Darkness**

**chanceXinfinity**

**Alluring Alliteration**

**lil' fayri grrl(I can't make any promises)**

**Soul-Whisperer**

**someonefromearth**

**IceFlake 77**

**The Emcee**

**Anemone94(though I'd never be a librarian, I'm flattered :) My goal in life is to be an author though. I have a dream!)**

**Basilisks(Your review made me smile uber much. Yes, Jamie's gay. I don't like how other authors go, "OH, I thought I liked girls, but then I saw him and realised that I really don't and now I'm in love with that guy even though I've never liked another boy in my life, yay rainbows! I HATE it... I hope mine doesn't seem like that :'( )**

**AkumaSherr**

**tsukiyomi83**

**Blackrose2255 (thank you so much! Writing is my life :) )**

**OH! Did you guys see the picture I drew for the picture thingy? I think it's sweet :)**

**I didn't go over this because rugby's on now, and I want to watch that... So, yeah, I'll go over it later...**

* * *

Jamie _knew _he was different from all the other little boys and girls. He knew when he was five years old, and Caitlin had kissed him on the playground and he couldn't stop crying. He didn't know what it _meant_ then, but after he was thirteen, and the boys at Ryan's birthday party had been talking about what girls they thought were hot, he couldn't conjure up any names and they called him a fag. He went home the next day, layed on his bed, and thought about what the word 'fag' really meant and why he found no girls attractive. He later came, _much _later, to the conclusion that he must've been a 'fag' because girls made him uncomfortable and he had always thought Ryan was... Well, he was cute, now that he thought of it. Ryan was his best friend though. And he had been under the impression that being gay was a bad thing. There had been one openly gay boy at Burgess. They had been a year older than Jamie, and they had been beaten up until you couldn't tell who they were by looking at _or _hearing them. When Jamie came to the conclusion that he was in fact like them(who was now a freshmen and home schooled) he was scared right into the darkest corner of the closet. He felt like he'd take his secret to the grave, until Ryan moved away last summer and Jamie realized he didn't have to live in a closed minded town for the rest of his life.

He told himself he wouldn't crush on anyone until he was gone and in a city and going to college. He _told_ himself. He had broken his own pinkie promise. But it didn't matter too much, right? It was just a crush. If he never told Jack, never hinted at it, never got too close, there wouldn't be a problem.

But Jamie couldn't help but feel just a bit _too _excited about going over to his house.

* * *

The next day, Jack woke at 9:00. For the longest time, he layed there and stared at his ceiling. He wasn't quite sure why, only that it felt nice to relax and feel like he was floating in mid air-only he could feel the mattress caressing his back and the blankets around his waist. When he looked at his clock, it was 10:14, so he stood up and decided he'd just wash his hair and wait to take a real shower after he was covered with paint.

When he walked into the living room his parents were already spreading out a tarp to keep drops off the wood. He quickly aided them and then, as they had sat on the couch to take a short break, he brought up Jamie.

"He said he'd help us if we needed it."

Anna looked at her husband. "Well, why not. The more teenage boys, the less we have to do." He said.

Jack hopped up and got his phone from his room.

_Are you up yet?_

After a few minutes, his phone chimed.

_yeah. u guys ready?_

Jack said yes and where his address was. Jamie proceeded to tell him he'd be over in fifteen minutes.

"He'll be here in a bit."

"Oh, great. I should make some snack for him. What does he like to eat? Is he allergic to anything?"

"Mom, mom, calm down. I'm sure you don't have to make snacks. We aren't having a play date."

She gave him a look. "We must me polite hosts. He's your new friend, and this is his first time coming over. I'll pop some popcorn and lay out some crackers." She hustled into the kitchen and Jack gave a half smile.

Fifteen minutes later, right on the dot, there was a knock on the door. Jack practically ran, but not really because_ he_ said it was speed walking, to open the door.

"Hey," Jamie greeted.

"Hey, uh, just come on in." Jack said and opened the door wider.

"Cool," Jamie stepped in and looked around. Anna pushed past Jack when she heard them talking.

"Jamie, it's so nice to meet you!" She grabbed his hand, not shaking it, but holding it like old women and excited mothers do. "You're such a sweet boy to offer to help. Isn't he such a sweetie, Mark?"

Mark, who had just peered in to look from the kitchen, a hand full of popcorn, said, "Teenage boys aren't sweet, Anna. They're courteous."

"Well, he's sweet."

"Nice to meet you, too," Jamie said with a chuckle.

"Well, this has been sufficiently awkward. How about we start painting?" Jack said after a pause.

"Yes, lets." Mark clapped his hands. "Jack and I'll take the rollers and start at the top. Jamie, how about you and Anna use the brushes and do the bottom?"

"Alright, that sounds good." Jamie said, and they started painting it from a gross, puke green to off white.

It took a while, since halfway through they all had a sort of paint fight; leaving Jamie's hair looking a lot like Jack's. After they finished the living room, going over the brush with the roller so it had the same texture, they decided to take a break before moving to the kitchen.

"Mark, we forgot! C'mon, before the paint dries." Anna stood up hurriedly and tugged him to the corner. "Jack, get your little butt over here."

Jamie stood as he watched each of them press their hand into the wet paint by the floor, leaving an impressing.

"Jamie, sweetie, come here." She waved him over and he hesitantly shuffled there. "How about you put your hand print down?"

"Oh, no, that's okay." He said and blushed a little.

"C'mon, you helped paint. You're like part of the family now." She insisted.

"You might as well, or else you'll never leave the house." Jack said and grinned at him.

Jamie's breath caught in his throat.

"W-well, okay, I guess." He crouched and pressed his hand next to Jack's impression awkwardly and Anna hugged him around the shoulders.

"There, was that so hard?"

He smiled sheepishly.

"How about we take a lunch break, then get started on the kitchen? I'll make some sandwiches. And maybe some soup. And a salad, we've been working hard. What kind do you want, sweetie?" She looked at Jamie.

"Um, whatever's fine. I'm not picky."

"Isn't he a sweetie?" She said to her husband, who crossed his arms and shook his head with a small smile.

"How about we go into my room?" Jack asked.

_My god, say that again, _Jamie thought then reprimanded himself.

"Hmm?"

"I said, how about we go into my room?"

Okay, so Jamie wasn't a Saint. Bite him.

"Alright," he responded, then Jack lead him to the back of the house and through the door.

"Well, this is where I sleep and hang out on the weekdays _and _weekends." Jack said and proceeded to flip on his lamp and sit on his desk chair backwards.

"You're mom's nice." Jamie started.

Jack laughed lightly, and Jamie's heart fluttered.

"She's just excited to see I've made a friend."

"Moving can be tough," Jamie commented and Jack stiffened slightly.

"Yeah, it can." Jack said.

"So, uh, do you guys do the hand print thing a lot?"

"Oh, yeah, it started seven years ago. Now every time we paint our living room, we do that."

Jamie chuckled.

"That's pretty cool. How did it start?"

Jack's body language changed instantly. His jaw tightened, fingers gripped the back of his chair and turned white, and muscles turned frigid and stiff.

"I don't know. It just did."

Jamie wasn't lying when he said he felt uncomfortable and he swore he could feel a cold wind radiating from the other teen.

"I-I'm sorry for-"

"No," Jack interrupted and slumped, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't've reacted like that. I just... I just don't want to talk about it."

"Okay. You know, that's fine. It's fine." Jamie insisted.

Jack gave him a small smile.

They slowly, but effortlessly, slipped back into their usual chatting.

"C'mon boys, lunch time!" Anna called and they both got up and went into the kitchen.

She had in fact made soup, salad, and sandwiches.

"I hope you don't mind that there's no meat." She said as she sat down.

"Oh, that's fine."

"I mind," Mark said from where he was sitting.

"No one cares, hun."

They ate with playful bantering and chatting and Jack felt glad that his friend seemed to be comfortable and unaffected by their blatant awkwardness.

"Well, I guess it's time to paint this room." Anna said, but made no move to get up.

"Do we really have to? This color's nice." Mark said and leaned back in his chair.

"It doesn't match the cows, hun." She said, but you could hear in her tone that she was considering leaving it.

"Cow's eyes are brown. The walls are brown. There."

"Mmm... Okay. Fine."

Mark grinned congratulatory and high-fived Jack.

"You guys are free to do whatever then."

"Actually, my mom wanted me to come right back. I have to babysit."

All three of the Frosts' lips tightened into thin lines.

"Okay, sweetie." Anna said and began to clear the table.

"I guess I'll see you on Monday then." Jack said and stood up to walk him to the door.

"Yeah, okay. It was fun."

"Yeah," Jack smiled at him and his eyes warmed slightly.

"'Bye," Jamie waved.

"'Bye."

* * *

"Oh, good, you're here," Mrs. Bennett said when Jamie walked through the door, "Sophie's playing in here room. I already fed her. Oh dear, what happened to your hair?"

"Uh, paint fight." He said sheepishly and grinned.

"Well, clean up, okay? I should be back by seven." She decided to skip the usual goodbye kiss to the head and quickly walked out the door.

He decided to take a quick shower while Sophie was preoccupied.

"Jamie! Jamie!" His sister called from down the hall. In a flash, she ran up and slammed him with a hug after he walked out the bathroom. "Look what I drew. Isn't it pretty?"

"The prettiest thing I've ever seen." He said and picked her up. "Do you want me to draw with you?"

"Yes, yes! Jamie, can you draw me a tree? A-and put a squirrel on it?"

Jamie smiled and laughed. "Of course, my fair princess."

They spent an hour drawing until Sophie insisted that they bake cookies, then watch Monsters Inc. At six, Jamie cooked mac and cheese, then made her take a bath.

"Thanks so much," his mother said when she walked in the door and heard Sophie's giggles in the bathroom.

"It's no problem." Jamie said with a shrug and sat down at the table. "Uh, mom, I've got to ask a question."

"Yeah, kiddo?" She asked while putting some groceries into the cupboard.

"Could you sit?"

"Oh, okay," She said cautiously and sat down opposite of him, "this is serious then?"

"Well, yeah. Kinda." Jamie straightened up. "Sooo... What do you do when you like someone... but you can't? And you know they'll never like you?"

"You're asking _me _for relationship advice?" She said, shocked. She had figured, since he was a boy and for as long as he had been _born_, he had never been interested in anyone.

"Yeah, mom, okay, I am. But really, what do I do?"

"Okay," she straightened up too and crossed her arms on the table. "well, first, how do you know that they'll never like you back?"

"I just... I just know."

"Okay... Okay, then, how much do you like this person?"

"So much," he mumbled and layed his head on the table with a thump. "I know I shouldn't, but I can't stop. I barely even know them."

Mrs. Bennett opened her mouth then shut it. Someone he barely knew? He knew practically everyone in Burgess. Unless there was someone who was new-

Her eyes opened wide and she retracted her hands into her lap. That boy that Jamie mentioned was new.

"What... What's their name?"

"Does it matter?" He asked miserably. "How do you stop liking someone?"

"Well, um, lets see," she coughed and Jamie raised his head, "you could reduce your contact to them."

"I can't do that. They're my friend."

"Oh, well, you can't just... stop?"

"Mom, you're not very helpful." He said with a straight face.

"Jamie, sometimes people like people they can't have. Sometimes it's for the best. Sometimes it's better to stay single." She said and felt close to crying. What had happened to that other boy had been in the papers. She didn't want that for her son. He could be gay, he could be straight, he could be attracted to people with green hair, for all she cared. As long as he was safe.

Jamie looked up at the ceiling and he quirked his mouth. "Yeah, I guess. Thanks mom."

"As long as your happy, everything will be alright. Okay?" She said and stood up to give him a hug.

"Jeez, okay mom. No need to get all touchy-feely, I'm not a girl." Jamie said but hugged her back and squeezed.

"I love you," she said and looked him in the eye, "no matter what."

"Love you too." He kissed her cheek and went into his room before playing video games and eventually falling asleep.

* * *

Down the street and several blocks away, Jack was laying on his bed with his arms behind his head. Today had been fun, even though it had its tense moments. After Jamie had left, his mother had gone back to the hand prints and sat next to them silently until his dad had lifted her up and sent her to the bathroom to clean up. Jack had waited till six to shower because he had felt lazy and lethargic and wanted to lay around and think about his place in the universe. He was clean and still slightly damp. The cold clang to the droplets on his skin and felt like the little kisses of snowflakes.

He looked at the corner of the room to see the wooden staff that lounged against the wall. It was long and thin and crooked at the tip, like a Sheppard's staff. He treasured it more than anything.

With a sigh, he turned on his side and stared at the wall until he swore he could see pictures in the wallpaper. His eyes started to drift shut, and his last thought before he sunk into unconsciousness was that Jamie's smile was really nice.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey, I'm back. This chapter is... interesting? I guess :) I hope you like it... I kinda like it... Kinda. I do? Maybe... yes, no? I don't know.**

**Shout out to!**

**Tenshi Yami- Angel of Darkness**

**Amiistarr**

** .Dawns (your comment doesn't make me feel awkward, it's flattering. Your user name, does, though. Haha, I'm just kidding. I like it.)**

**MidnightRhymer**

**IceFlake 77**

**AkumeSherr**

**The Emcee**

**Mallory Mirkov**

**Alluring**** Alliteration**

**purplegirlpower22**

**ThePreppyEmo**

**Oh, and if you want to see a bigger picture of the one I drew, go toooooo: art/ Snowflakes-Rise-of-the-Guardians-FF-340788467 (no spaces)**

**Oh, yeah, this chapter gets kind of heavy. Just letting you know.**

* * *

When Jack woke that Sunday morning, he decided that it would be a fine day to go explore the town. It had been years since he had done so. It used to bring him great pleasure: wandering around and watching people laugh and interact. After what had happened... He stopped doing it. It no longer made him feel warm and light and fluttery. All that was left was a cold, stiff, blank eyed persona. And for some reason, he didn't feel like that anymore. Or, at least not completely. The layers of ice hadn't melted altogether, and he didn't think they ever would.

It was starting to warm up as he left his house at seven. The sky was a blue that almost matched his eyes, and he saw birds fluttering and singing in the trees. He thought birds were beautiful, with such grace and power and freedom in their little bodies. Flying fascinated him especially.

The town had just started to awaken, but was mostly made up of church goers and adults off to work. The rest of the people who had nothing else to do were still asleep, and Jack imagined Jamie snoring on his bed with drool coming out of his mouth and he chuckled. In all actuality, he felt bad about the way he had acted towards the other. He knew it wasn't fair, and that there was no way Jamie could know what to avoid, but Jack couldn't help but flinch and close himself off. He hadn't healed yet. His family hadn't healed.

But in a way, Jamie was helping him heal. Jamie made him feel nice. Jamie made him feel wanted. Jamie made him feel _seen_. And best of all, he made him happy and fluttery and light, just like his walks around town used to.

Jack decided to walk to the park, which had a small playground and a dense enough forest. There was no one around, so he walked in a beautiful silence with his hands in his pocket. The packs of trees slowly started to die out until he was face to face with a clearing and a large pond. Jack froze in his walk and stared at it. For a moment, that's all he could do. And then he took off in the opposite direction until he bursted out onto the sidewalk. But he didn't stop there. He kept running until he reached his front door, went past his mother who looked startled, and slammed into his room. He shut the door, twisted the lock, and pounced on his bed with his hands clinging at his hair and his face in the pillow. He didn't know he had been sobbing until he woke up some hours later and felt the sticky itch of dried tears on his cheeks and the soreness of his eyes.

He didn't leave his room, not even after his mother begged him to come out.

* * *

On Monday, Jamie instantly noticed the absence of Jack, since they usually saw each other in the mornings and sat next together for lunch; even though it was a B day and they didn't have painting. He felt worried and concerned, like friends usually are, especially when one of them had too much of an imagination and always thought of the worst things that could happen. He texted Jack asking if he was okay or sick and didn't get a response which only made him worry more and he couldn't focus for the rest of the day.

Sometimes, Jamie acted like a mother hen. A mother hen who was infatuated with their little hen... Okay, so maybe that wasn't the best comparison but Jamie spent every period that day wondering why Jack wasn't there.

He spent thirty minutes after the last bell rang deciding whether or not to go to Jack's house and see what was up, or settling with texting him again. It might've been his toughest choice ever to be confronted at him. With a distressed look on his face, he decided to just text him again.

_Hey, u okay?_

He never got a response.

* * *

Jack spent most of the day laying on his bed, drifting back and forth between restless sleep and staring at the staff propped up on the wall. He lay, stiff and numb, and would occasionally sit up as if possessed with an urge to fix himself, but would just collapse back down in a heap and let out a little sob. He knew it wasn't helping him. He knew that he should've gone to school, or at least replied to Jamie's texts. He knew that there were better ways to make him feel better and he _knew_ that he was only hurting himself.

With a start, he jumped out of his bed, a little wobbly, and took two long strides to his desk. In his top drawer, right next to his sketchbook, in his tin box was something that he had taken comfort in. Taken horrible, beautiful, unhealthy, torturous comfort in.

The metal felt cool and familiar between his finger tips. It had been two weeks since he had touched it, which really wasn't that long, but felt like to an eternity to people like him.

Jackson Overland Frost was a cutter.

And nobody knew it.

He had little scars, none of them longer than three inches, decorating his arms. Some were years old. Some were months old. Some were still pink and scabbed.

He went back to his bed with the razor still pinched between his fingers. Sitting on the edge of it, he turned the sharp edge and set it on his skin. He kept it there without putting any pressure on it, just letting it tickle his flesh. It was disturbing, how much he had missed the feeling of cutting his skin open and watching it bleed.

He bit his lip before pressing the blade hard into his skin and drawing it across his forearm. Years of mutilating his body had made him accustomed to the pain and allowed him to cut deeper. It pinched slightly and stung, but he could feel his stress decreasing and his muscles relax. It was sick, but it was an addiction. A release. At least he wasn't injecting his body with drugs.

The blood bubbled and collected on his skin and he smeared it with his thumb, which only aggravated his wound more. But it felt nice. It looked nice. I looked beautiful. So he did it again. And again. And soon enough, he had five cuts on his left arm and three on his right, and his arms were stinging but he felt better and sucked in a breath and he layed on his back and looked at the ceiling.

Jack wasn't suicidal. Jack cherished life. He knew it was special and shouldn't be taken advantage of. But seeing the cuts on his arms, and feeling them, and having the control of scarring himself and making him hurt gave him a thrill and made him feel _good_. People thought of cutters as people who wore black and despised life and cried in their room about how much they hated themselves. That wasn't the case. Or, at least for real cutters. The people who smiled and hid their scars. People who didn't show off what they did in the confines of their rooms. They knew it was unhealthy. But they couldn't stop. It was a true addiction.

Jack got up after several minutes to clean off his arms in the bathroom. He made sure his parents weren't around and treaded quietly. After cleaning off the blood, he wrapped his arms with thin bandages, because the pressure felt nice and he didn't want to bleed on his sheets or favorite hoodie. For the rest of the day, he listened to his music and painted snow scenes.

* * *

The next day, he went back to school to see a very anxious Jamie.

"Oh, dude, where were you?" Jamie said when he saw him that morning.

"I was feeling sick." Jack replied with a shrug. "Why, did you miss me?"

Jack grinned. Jamie sucked in a breath.

"Oh, you know, whatever." He mumbled. "Are you feeling better?"

"Much," Jack said. "I've got to go get my work from my other classes. I'll see you third period, Jamie."

The brown haired teen practically swooned when he heard his name from the other teens lips. Oh god, he was screwed.

"Okay, see you later." And for some reason, Jamie patted his arm.

Jack flinched.

Dear lord.

He was a homophobe, Jamie just knew it.

_I'm so screwed._

Jack wasn't a homophobe, but he did have somewhere he needed to go. He was not, in fact, going to his missed classes. They were mostly art classes. He was actually going to the little forest in the back of the school to skip his first two classes. He didn't want to learn about history and algebra. He didn't want to do anything but paint and fill his lungs with smoke.

The gap in the fence greeted him like an old friend and he sat on the shaded dirt and lit his first cigarette. He took a slow drag and held it in him till his lungs ached and his throat burned. He let his jaw go slack and slowly huffed out the smoke and sucked in a breath of fresh air. He sat up against the tree, let the bark cut into his back through his shirt, and rested his head against it and closed his eyes. He felt peaceful.

He smoked five cigarettes before lunch and decided that he'd sit with Jamie instead of blowing him off. He knew that he smelled like smoke(and felt light-headed), but there wasn't much he could do to cover it up. He chewed on two pieces of mint gum, and spread some scented lotion on his hands to maybe cover up the smell on his fingers. Thankfully, the lazy breeze that had picked up drifted the smoke away from him, but it didn't help completely. He just hoped Jamie didn't have a sensitive nose.

Jamie didn't say anything when he sat down, or during the whole lunch period. Jamie actually seemed in an edgy mood himself. Jack didn't want to mention anything about it, because he knew how he got and he knew that other people could be as sensitive as him. When they sat down for painting, Jamie still kind of looked like something was heavy on his mind.

Jack had moved on to the next assignment while Jamie was just finishing the old one; a color wheel that showed the primary colors and secondary. Jamie couldn't stop thinking about the events that had happened earlier. And this freaking color wheel, which included all the colors of the _rainbow_ wasn't helping. Then it inspired a thought.

"So, rainbows..." Jamie started slowly.

"What about them?" Jack asked while he pinched his sleeve from getting into the paint while he blended black and blue together.

"They're, uh, pretty, you know?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that." He said, slightly distracted.

"They've got some interesting meanings behind them. God's promise to the world, rebirth, the gay community..." Jamie said and slowly drifted to a slight whisper.

"Yeah. They sure do have a lot of jobs." Jack said and put his paintbrush down. "Are you getting to a point or something?"

"I was just kind of curious, how they started representing the LGBT people and stuff..." Jamie said and started blushing uncontrollably. Oh god, this was a mistake.

"I couldn't tell you." Jack replied and started painting again.

"What do you think?"

"About what?"

"The LGBT community?"

"Well, I'm not a homophobe, if that's what you're asking."

"You aren't?" Jamie asked, surprised. At least he had that.

"No, I mean, that would be pretty stupid," Jack chuckled. "I kinda can't be."

"Oh, okay, uh, wow," Jamie sucked in a breath. "that's good then."

"Why?" Jack looked up at the other teen's eyes.

"No reason, just curious." Jamie said quickly. Too quickly. Jack quirked his eyebrow.

"Jamie.. are you gay?"

Jamie's heart stopped. It literally stopped. He just died. Dead. Here sit Jamie Maxwell Bennett, July 25, 1996-September 28, 2012. Beloved brother and son.

"Jamie? You don't need to be embarrassed." Jack sat up and pointed at himself. "I, Jack Frost, am pansexual. I don't believe people should judge each other by what their bodies say. Why confine your life like that? Why miss out on so many things? See, I'm not afraid to say it. If you're gay, it doesn't matter." He gave him a reassuring smile. "If you're straight it doesn't matter. You're my friend, okay?"

That brought him back. _You're my friend. _Friend. Friend.

Friend friend friend friend friend friend.

"I have to go to the bathroom." Jamie stated and left the room without looking up.

He went to the closest bathroom with an actual door and locked it after making sure it was empty. He leaned his weight on his arms against the sink and looked into his reflection. And he looked. Jack Frost... Did he really just say that he was pan? That was like bi, right? Jamie tried to remember. After he said he was pan, Jamie kind of blanked out until Jack mentioned they were friends. Friends. It stung and was reassuring at the same time.

But Jack was okay that he was gay. Or, possibly gay, according to Jack's current knowledge. Well, considering how he left, the suspicions were gone. Jamie was gay and Jack knew it.

And Jack was okay with it.

* * *

**Tell me how you feel about this little turn of events. Like it? Hate it? I think it's pretty realistic, I mean, friends talk casually to each other like that, right? And I think Jack's pan, honestly. He gives off the vibe. Anyway, review it, please :) OH! I almost forgot. The fiftieth reviewer(who is NOT a guest) gets to choose a one shot or drabble subject that I will write and dedicate to them. I will email you, no need to mention it in the comments. Thanks guys :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you for 50+ reviews! You guys, *tears up*, I just love you!**

**Shout out to!**

**AmiiStarr (Yes, I know about cutting. I myself am one. It's great that you've been clean for that long :) I'm proud)**

**Camila Can't Think (Awe, thank you so much :) )**

**someonefromearth**

**Vampwolf13**

**IceFlake 77 (Awe shucks, I loved your review. I put a lot of effort into detailing my characters. I write how I would want to read, if that makes sense. I'm glad you picked up on him thinking a lot about being pansexual. Yes, he thought A LOT about it. He doesn't want to restrict possibilities in life.)**

**Tenshi Yami-Angel of Darkness**

**Mallory Mirkov**

**purplegirlpower22**

**BAYBAY841(Haha, "angsty angsty emo child". I like that. But thank you, realistic's what I am for :) )**

**Soul-Whisperer**

**Roanam**

**MisMorningBird**

**So this is the moment you've all been waiting for! Drum roll please! Aaaaannndddd, read! (and review, and follow, and favorite ;) )**

* * *

Jack stared as Jamie got up and left. After ten minutes, he still hadn't returned and Jack started to worry. Had he said the wrong thing? It didn't matter to him if Jamie was gay. Jack was accepting of everyone(it was them that had a problem with him). Jack didn't mean to offend him or anything. He was just honest. Sexuality shouldn't be something that people should be ashamed of. Jack hadn't been ashamed of it. Jack had never been ashamed of it. His parents knew, and though they though it was a "phase", they didn't mind if he "dated" boys. As long as he was happy. And Jack wanted that for Jamie. He wanted him to be happy.

When the clock only had seven minutes left, Jamie walked back in with his head hung. He took his time getting to the table, and Jack looked at him expectantly. When Jamie finally sat down and looked up, Jack was politely smiling at him.

"You don't need to tell me if you don't want to." He said simply and began to clean up.

And Jamie was thankful and disappointed.

Later that day, after everyone had gone home to do homework, or hang out, or masturbate, Jamie sat on his bed and stared at his phone. He was torn between asking Jack if he "wanted to talk", or just drown himself in books and try to forget the horrifying experience that he had had.

After a long while, he decided that the former would do him good. It was time for him to step up and be a man.

_hey, do u want to get together and talk?_

_Sure. Where do you want to meet?_

_do u no where the park is?_

Jack bit his lip and stared at the message.

_It's too cold to go to the park. How about the Coffee Cave?_

It, of course, wasn't too cold. It was still September, and the weather hadn't been anything but flawless.

_okay i guess. see u soon_

Jamie didn't really want to go somewhere that was too public and had the risk of being over heard. But since it was Tuesday, and there probably wouldn't be many people there, he figured that they would be safe enough.

Twenty minutes later, Jack walked up the steps of the small coffee shop and looked around. He didn't see Jamie, so he ordered a drink and sat in plain view. While he sipped, Jamie walked through the door, looking incredibly nevous. He gestured at the small room that was set apart from the rest of the shop and Jack got up and went in after the other teen.

"I figured it'd be safer here." Jamie commented and sat down at the table.

"Safer?" Jack asked and sat down across from him. He sat his drink down lightly and crossed his arms.

"You know... so no one can hear us." Jamie whispered.

"Why is that a big deal?" Jack whispered back.

"Jack, this town isn't exactly the most accepting place. It can be pretty closed minded." Jamie looked at him with a completely serious face. "We could get beaten up. Or worse."

Jack sat back. "So, you admit it then?"

"Admit what?" Jamie asked with a puzzled look.

"That you're gay." Jack said, but still leaned closer and whispered for Jamie's sake.

"I, uh, never said that."

Jack gave him a look.

"You don't have to pretend with me, Jamie. There's nothing to hide." Jack insisted and Jamie could tell by his look and voice that he really ment it. With a great pause and a big inhale that almost hurt, Jamie replied.

"Yes." He said and exhaled in a big gust. He had never told anyone, and here he was, telling his crush. His crush who was looking at him with beautiful blue eyes and smiling. Jamie just wanted to kiss him, or throw up, or scream.

"Do you feel better?"

Jamie nodded.

"Good. Now, what did you want to talk about?"

Jamie stared at him and gaped.

"Oh, was that what you wanted to talk about?" Jack asked and took a sip of his chilled drink.

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

Jack just smiled at the other teen.

* * *

Two weeks had passed and Jamie had felt relieved and also disappointed. Isn't how it worked that when you told the person you liked the truth, you got together, and married, and had babies, and such? Movies and books had cruelly lied to him.

It was now well into October, and Jack hadn't brought up sexuality or rainbows or anything. Nothing. No profession of undying love and perpetual happiness in each other's arms. Nada. Jamie was actually frustrated.

_Maybe I should take matters into my own hands._

Oh god, no, that was a bad idea.

No, it wasn't.

Yes, it was.

No.

Yes.

No.

No.

He would start out small. That started with them getting to know each other better.

On Friday, Jamie brought it up during painting.

"So, how would you feel about coming over tonight?" Jamie said like a bad host asking a guy on the street if he wanted to participate in a game show. This made Jack laugh.

"Um, okay," Jack said after he had stopped and bit his lip. He didn't know if it was a bad idea, but Jamie and him hadn't spent a lot of time outside of school. He regretted that. And here Jamie was, inviting him over. It would either end up terribly horrendous, or be the most fun he had had in _forever_.

"Sweet," Jamie smiled brightly and kept it during the whole period.

When Jack came home, he found his mom in the kitchen and sat down at the table.

"Jamie wants me to come over."

Anna looked at her son and sat down her soapy sponge.

"Oh really, sweetie?" She sat down. "Do you think that's a good idea? I mean, we love Jamie, but, you know, it might be..."

"Difficult considering what's at his house?"

"Yes, hun. Are you sure?" She reached her hand across the table and touched his clothed arm.

"I can't just never go over. C'mon, I'm a teenager, and Jamie's my friend. Maybe even my best friend." Jack said and shrugged.

"Okay, okay. If you think it's a good idea, I give you my permission." She stood up and went back to the sink. "Are you spending the night?"

"Um, I don't know. Maybe." He got up and pulled his phone out.

_When do you want me to come over?_

_hows 4:30?_

Jack said okay and Jamie told him where he lived. It was implied that he would end up spending the night, but Jack didn't pack anything(ignoring his mom's protests) besides his nerves. He told his mom that he didn't need a ride because he'd walk, and she fake pouted and ignored him until he walked out, yelling an "I love you, smoochie poo!" as he shut the door with a wave.

It didn't take too long to find his house: two stories with a small yard and the numbers 1749 on the face of it. It looked nice and well lived in. It was the house that Jamie had grown up in.

Jack knocked on the door, and the woman that he had seen his first day of opened it.

"Well, hello there hunnie." Oh God, she was just like his own mom. "It's nice to see you again. Jamie's told me about you. I won't say _all_ about you, because Jamie doesn't talk much about-"

"Hey, mom, yeah, I've got this now." He gently nudged her to the side and opened the door wider. "Greetings." He said and Jack smiled.

"Greetings." Jack said back and walked in. The smell of baking cookies hit him full force and he took in a big sniff. "Your house smells nice."

"Yeah, well, Sophie loves to bake. Okay, she loves to _watch_ people bake and then eat it."

Jack tried his best not to react to the mention of Sophie. The whole walk over there, he had ran scenarios through his head and steeled himself up. He knew it'd be difficult, but he had to do it. Jamie ment more to him than his guilt and ghosts.

"Jamie, Jamie!" A little girl's voiced called out and soon enough, a flash of shaggy blond hair came flying around the corner and latched itself onto the brown haired boy. "Eat it!"

She shoved a chocolate chip cookie at her brother who took it with a smile.

"Thanks, Sophie." He took an enthusiastic bite from it. "It's delicious."

The little girl looked from her brother to Jack. For a second, he could feel his heart stop.

"Do you want a cookie too?" She asked innocently. He inhaled sharply.

"No, thank you."

She stared at him seriously. "Yes you do." She then stuck it in his hand and left.

There was a moment of silence before Jack cracked a smile and looked at Jamie before taking a bite.

"You're right, they are delicious."

Jamie smiled back.

They spent the rest of the day goofing off, watching movies, and playing video games. Sophie had spent some of the time with them out of childish curiosity, and even though Jack felt tight and sick inside, he smiled at her and answered as many of her questions as he could.

"Why is your hair white? You don't look old."

"I dye it."

Jamie gave him a sideways glance.

"How old are you?"

"I'm seventeen."

"Where are you from?"

"Riverside."

"Where's that?"

"On the other side of the state."

"Why'd you come here?"

Jack looked down and then back at her. "Uh, my parent's changed their work." Well, at least it wasn't a complete lie.

"Do you have any brothers or sisters?"

Jack retracted a bit and glanced nervously at Jamie before looking down at his hands and taking a shaky breath.

"No." He replied shamefully, and Jamie gave him a concerned look.

"Okay Sophie, we're done here." He stood up. "C'mon Jack, lets go to my room."

Jack gratefully followed him up the stairs and Jamie clicked the door shut.

"Hey, dude, I'm sorry about her." He started and Jack sat on the edge of the bed.

"I-it's okay," Jack said and wrapped his arms around himself, "it's fine."

"C'mon, Jack, it's not fine." Jamie sat next to him. "I know something's been bothering you. You can tell me."

Jack shrunk a bit. "I can't. I can't."

"Jack, I came out to you. I never thought I would ever come out. I trust you. Do you trust me?"

Jack though about that. Did he trust Jamie? He knew that Jamie was probably his best friend. And best friends trusted each other. Jamie had opened up to him, and Jack had felt open and like his old self around the other teen. He _did_ trust him.

"Yes," he replied.

"Then you can tell me what's bothering you."

"I... I don't even know how to start." He said and dropped his head into his hands.

"Just tell me why you get all tense whenever I mention my sister. Or just now, when she was asking you questions."

"I..." Jack sucked in a breath and exhaled slowly. His heart beat picked up and it started to loudly beat. His ghosts were pounding their fists in his chest. "I... I had a sister. Her name was Emma."

Jamie leaned in closer and looked intently at the other teen.

"I let her die." Jack said bluntly and started to tear up. He bit his lip hard and Jamie put his hand on his back. "I tried to save her, but I let her die."

"I'm sure there was nothing you could-"

"It was all my idea. I wanted to take her ice skating before the pond melted. It started to crack under her. She called out my name, and I turned around, and I could see it. She was terrified. _I _was terrified, but I tried not to show it. I wanted to get her to thicker ice, but before I could, she went through. I saw her face. She was crying. I-I went in after her, but her coat was so thick and it dragged her down. It was so dark under the ice. And so cold. I couldn't find her. Before I knew it, _I _was drowning. Everything went dark. I was sure I was dead. But the next thing I knew, I was coughing up water on the snow, and my father was hovering over me. He was yelling and crying. I didn't know what was happening. I just couldn't keep my eyes open." Jack was shaking his head and sniffling. His voice felt hoarse from talking so quickly and so strained. Fat tears rolled down his cheeks and his body was shivering. Jamie put his arms around him. "When I woke up, I was in the hospital. They told me that Emma was dead. They told me that I almost died. But I _did_ die. I died in that pond. And I killed my sister."

Jamie breathed slowly and looked at his wall. "Jack, you didn't kill your sister. You risked your life to try and save her. It's not your fault."

"But it _is_ my fault! If I hadn't taken her out that day, she'd still_ be_ here."

"I don't think she'd want you to think like that. Jack, it's _not your fault_. You would've _never_ had done that intentionally. You're a good person. Don't destroy yourself over something that couldn't've been helped."

Jamie turned Jack's face toward him so he could look him in the eye. Jack looked helplessly at him, and Jamie felt like kissing him.

They stared at each other for what felt like minutes, but was only a matter of seconds. For a second, Jamie thought something was going to happen.

"Thank you, Jamie." He whispered. The other teen nodded and pulled him into a tight hug, which Jack let out a strangled sob and buried his face in the other's neck. He gripped Jamie's shirt with his pale, shaking fingers and didn't let go, even as Jamie set his fingers in his hair and brought him closer and whispered things into his ear and rubbed circles on his back.

Jamie was there for him. Jamie had been the only person there for him. And for that, Jack loved him.


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay, yeah, I know, you guys all called it last chapter. But he, where else would all the angst come from? Jack's got to be depressed by something, right? And I wanted to incorporate as much from the movie as possible.  
**

**This is a little on the short side. I really wanted to get it out over an hour ago, but oooohhhh wellllll. **

**Shout out to!**

**Alluring Alliteration**

**Cold Colors**

**MsMorningBird**

**Roanam**

**SkyHighFan**

**Tenshie Yami-Angel of Darkness**

**purplegirlpower22**

**Mallory Mirkov (Actually, I do believe Jack's sister was never really named. Pippa was the name of one of Jamie's friends. And thank you.)**

**ThePreppyEmo (Ah, thank you so much! So flattered right now)**

**KaiFudo16**

**IceFlake 77 (Take a breath. Okay? Okay, now read :) )**

**Apple Republic**

**Broken Hearted Bible (This might sound terrible, but having someone cry over what I wrote is like an amazing compliment. I'm sorry I hurt you :( But thank you so much)**

* * *

After Jack had finally exhausted his tears, they sat the for several moments with Jamie hugging him and Jack leaning against him. Jamie had his chin on the top of the other's head with his eyes shut and his mind racing. Jack had lived with that burden. Jack had lived with that terrible burden. Jack thought it was his fault, even though it wasn't. Not at all. It broke Jamie's heart.

"It's okay," he whispered into his hair. Jack didn't say anything back, but drifted slowly to steady breathing. "It's late. How 'bout we go to bed?"

"Okay," he said back and pulled back. His eyes were red, but his cheeks were dry. He still looked like a mess.

Jamie put his hand on the other's cheek and looked him in the eye. "Are _you_ okay?"

"Yeah. I... I am. It's like this big boulder's been pulled of my chest. I didn't think it'd feel this good to tell someone." Jack sighed and gave him a small smile. "Thank's Jamie."

He pulled back his hand and was surprised to realize, now that emotions were finally dampened, that Jack's skin was abnormally cool.

"You can sleep on my bed."

Jack smiled a quirked smile. "You know, we can share. It's not like your bed's small." He chuckled. "I won't call no homo."

Jamie chuckled too and was pleased that Jack seemed better.

"Do you want to borrow some pyjamas?"

"No, no, I'm fine." He insisted and pulled his hoodie closer.

"You sure?" Jack nodded. "We'll, don't mind me." He said and stood to change.

Jack usually preferred to sleep only in his boxers, but considering he was at Jamie's and that he didn't really want to bear all his secrets at once, he stuck with keeping his hoodie on, claiming he felt chilly. Putting into account that Jack's temperature was usually cold, Jamie understood and didn't bother him about it.

Surprisingly to Jamie, sharing a bed with Jack wasn't as exciting as it seemed. Maybe since it really wasn't anything sexual and the thought of them doing unmentionables in his room kind of made him sick after what Jack had confessed to him.

That morning, Jack appeared to be much better. The brown haired teen didn't know if it was all a facade, but he was happy that the other wasn't crying and shaking.

Mrs. Bennett woke them up by chocolate chip pancakes (Jamie's personal favorite, even though he said Sophie was the one that loved them) and Jack smiled and laughed and entertained Sophie as best as he could. He thanked Jamie's mom for letting him come over and cooking breakfast, but said that he should be going home because his parent's wanted him back before noon.

"Thanks Jamie. Really. I had a lot of fun. Besides, you know, the whole... You know." Jack shrugged.

"Yeah, of course. I'll see you Monday then."

When Jack walked through the front door, his mom came running up.

"Oh, sweetie, how was it? Did you have fun? Did you go to bed at a respectable time?"

"Mom, mom, calm down. Yes, we had fun. We went to bed at twelve. And yes, that's a 'respectable' time." He said before she protested.

"Everything was okay?" She gave him a look, and he knew what that meant.

"Yes, it was okay." She said and left it at that

That Monday, Jack deceived no perception that he was anything less than fine. And it was true. He felt good. He felt nice. He felt... somewhat unhaunted.

Halloween came, with Jamie and Jack just hanging out and watching scary movies, then Thanksgiving, where Jack spent two days with his relatives, which included his Uncle North and Uncle-in-Law, who everyone just called Bunny, though he was an over six foot Australian with a potentially mean glare. Gradually, the snow began to come and Jack felt at home but yet saddened the closer January got. But it was still the beginning of December. His cutting had only increased slightly. Mostly, he spent his time with Jamie and was too busy to really fall back into harmful habits. When he wasn't with Jamie, he was painting. At school, when he wasn't skipping his boring classes, he was laughing with Jamie. They had gotten extremely close. But still, to Jamie's downfall, nothing "romantic" had happened. Several times he had thought something could happen. Sophie had jumped on them while they were watching a movie, which in turn shoved Jack closer to Jamie. They looked at each other for a few seconds before Jack broke out in a smile and pulled back.

On December 8th, Jack woke up at seven thirty to a text from Jamie. For a second he was frustrated to realize that it was _seven freaking thirty_, but when he looked at the message he couldn't help but split into a grin.

_hey birthday boy. dont i have a fun day planned 4 u_

_Oh really now?_

_yea, now get ur ass out of bed_

Jack swung the sheets off of him and got up before tugging on his hoodie and pulling on the closest pair of pants he could find. When he walked out the door, he smelled his mom's cooking and grinned like an idiot. But an even bigger surprise was the sight of Jamie sitting at his table.

"Hey," the brown haired teen greeted and waved.

"Isn't he such a sweetie?" Anna asked and ruffled his hair.

"Yes, mom, my best friend's a sweetie." He said sarcastically.

"Hey, watch it, or else I'll eat all this food." She joked and whapped him with her spoon.

Jack sat down and grabbed a plate for good measure.

"Do you want any?" Jack asked Jamie.

"I already ate some of your food, sleeping beauty. Though vegetarian sausage is really, uh, different."

Jack rolled his eyes and began to eat. After he was finished, Jamie grabbed his arm and pulled him up and towards the door.

"Well, we'll be going then, Anna!"

"Have him home before eleven, dear!"

"Maybe!"

Jamie pushed Jack out the door and was greeted by several feet of snow and it still precipitating. For a second, Jack just stood there, staring. It was the first _real _snow they had had.

"Wow," Jack breathed out. The beauty of it would never cease to amaze him.

With Jamie's hands on his shoulders, he leaned forward.

"You know, we could play in it instead of staring." He whispered and Jack smacked him and pulled away.

"Yeah, I know. I just needed a second." Jack gave him a very mischievous smirk, and it looked very natural on him, despite Jamie never seeing him like that. Before he knew it, Jack had jumped back and thrown a snowball right in his face.

"Ack, god, Jack! I wasn't ready!" But it was too late, Jack had gone running off with three snowballs tucked in the crook of his arm. Jamie had no idea how he had managed to make them so fast, but he went tearing off after him anyway.

For the next hour or so, they had battled in a snowball fight that will probably go down in history books, and after they had been spent, they slowed it down with sledding. Jack didn't stop smiling throughout the whole time, and this in turn made Jamie smile, and they smiled like idiots until they went back to Jack's house to change into drier clothes.

"C'mon, we're going to a movie. My treat."

"What movie?"

"Whatever's playing." Jamie smirked and they were off again. Thankfully, the local movie theater wasn't too far away from where Jack lived, so they're clothes didn't soak too bad.

It turned out that the only thing that was playing at that time was the Twilight movie, but feeling spontaneous, they decided to see it. Needless to say, most of the time they were whispering and giggling. Afterwards, Jamie decided to take them to The Coffee Cave for lunch and for his other surprise.

They sat in the side room and enjoyed each other's company while eating sandwiches and drinking hot chocolate. From the window's, they could still see the snow falling and people drifting about town. Jamie decided it'd be a good time to bring out his real present.

He took of the necklace that he had been hiding under his shirt and set it on the table. It was a wooden snowflake that had been hand carved.

"I made it for you." He said, sort of awkwardly. "But before you take it, I demand a trade."

"Um, okay? Do you want my soul or something?" Jack asked and smiled.

"No, no. I want your lighter."

Jack sucked in a breath.

"How do you-"

"Jack, I can smell the smoke on you. It's not healthy. It worries me. I saw your lighter on your desk. I can put two and two together. All I'm asking is for it to stop. You owe it to yourself."

Jack glanced down at the snowflake on the table. It must've taken him hours to make, and Jamie wasn't much of an artsy person. And he cared enough to confront him about it. But it was something he had been doing for two years. It was a habit that he'd fallen into.

"Please?" Jamie begged. Jack pursed his lips into a fine line and looked around. "Jack, I'm here for you. I don't want your smoking to get worse."

Jack inhaled deeply. He loved the way smoking made him feel. He loved smoke. He loved exhaling clouds of it.

But he loved Jamie more than that.

"Oh, fine, you jerk." He gave in and pulled out his lighter from his front pocket.

"I'm a jerk who cares, what can I say?" He took the lighter with the snowflake design and nudged the necklace closer to Jack, who picked it up and pulled it over his head.

"But thanks," Jack smiled. "I like it."

"You better _love _it; that thing took me forever to make."

"Fine, I love it."

Jamie grinned at him smugly.


	8. Chapter 8

**Wow. Over night, I got like a billion reviews. Wow. Thanks! And the 100th reviewer gets, yet again, a one-shot/drabble of their choice written by me. I ahven't finished the previous one, but it should be out soonish. School starts up tomorrow... But next week is winter break! Whoooo!**

**Shout out to!**

**Apple Republic (Jack is seventeen and a Junior, and Jamie is sixteen, same grade. You're grammar and everything is fine :) Even better than most first language English speakers, haha. Thanks for reviewing)**

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**The Singing Maiden (I Hope you don't regret shipping it, and I hope I portray it well enough :) )**

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**MsMorningBird**

**KaiFudo16**

**ThePreppyEmo (Thank you for adding it into the community. That's amazing!)**

**Decadent-Magpie(Well, even though the snowflake lighter is Jack's favorite, he does have others-as I explain a little more in this chapter. The snowflake one just represented him; cool on the exterior but a fire within sort of thing. Jack giving the lighter to Jamie was like him sort of giving himself to him, you know? I hope this clears it up a bit.)**

**A Hole in the Wall (Your reviewing etiquette was right. Thanks for the constructive criticism, I'll take that into account for future chapters.)**

**Pineapple the Fourth**

**Roanam**

**Matt(Guest)**

* * *

All of Jack's previous birthdays hadn't measured up to the one he had with Jamie. It was amazing. When they got back to Jack's, his mom had made a vegetarian lasagna, which he ate with gusto and Jamie ate with suspicion. They just decided Jamie would stay over the night, and they didn't sleep until five in the morning. The next day, the snow was still falling, and the Monday after would probably be cancelled. It was the best three days of his life. He never wanted it to end. But on Tuesday, the snow had vanished and they had to go back to school. Thankfully, though, the week after was the start of their winter vacation.

He spent the week before, though, skipping most of his classes to spend time in the woods. So ultimately, he had a longer break than all the other kids that dealt with math and history. Even though he had given up his favorite lighter, he had three more sitting around in hiding places. He knew that Jamie would be upset, but quitting cold turkey was difficult, like anyone else with an addiction would know. So Jack, trying to please the both of them, cut back to one every other day. It was painful, but he knew the pros outweighed the cons.

When Friday came around, and the break officially started, Jack and Jamie decided they'd go to the lake for a few days. After much convincing on both of their parts, Anna and Mrs. Bennett agreed that it'd be fine, since they were now young adults and could probably be responsible enough to stay alive on their own. Thankfully for the teens, the lake rented out cabins that were reasonably priced, spaced apart nicely, and were warm for the winter months.

"Are you sure you have enough blankets? And you have your sleeping bag? And you packed enough food, right?" Anna asked as she rustled through the car Jack was borrowing from them. Mark wasn't too keen on it, since Jack had _only_ gotten his license_ last yea_r(as Jack reminded him) and that it was his car and he didn't want it to get dirty.

"Mom, we won't freeze to death, nor will we starve. There's like three convenience stores over there and a diner."

"Do you have enough emergency money? Here, let me get my purse..."

"Mom, stop, it's fine. I've got to go pick up Jamie, okay? I'll see you Monday." He smiled at her and gave her a hug. "I love you."

"Aw, sweetie, I love you too. Now... I guess you can leave. Be safe! Dear lord, be safe."

"Yeah, yeah." He said and slipped into the driver's seat. "Bye mom!"

"Bye, sweetie! Have fun!"

Jack started the engine and drove off to Jamie's, where he was carrying out item's he needed for the trip. Jack got out and helped him pack it in and Mrs. Bennett stood at the door in her slippers and waved them off as the drove away.

The lake was about forty minutes away, and the drive didn't seem very long since they talked and laughed the whole way. Jamie, since he hadn't yet got his licence, despite being months over sixteen, was ecstatic that he could have a weekend vacation without his family. Camping had always been an unpleasent experience for him, since they went with his dad, and he could feel the tension between his parents. It was "all for the kids' sake", but mostly for Sophie since Jamie could see right through them. Don't get him wrong, he loved his dad, but his dad and his mom together? Talk about an awkward situation.

But this time he was with his best friend and secret crush, and since they were alone and away from normal stresses, Jamie planned(or at least hoped) that something would spark near the icy lake. And who knew, maybe he wouldn't leave with his best friend. Maybe he'd leave with a boyfriend.

When they arrived, the first thing they did was pile blankets, heat spacers, and sleeping bags into the cabin. It was considerably colder up on the mountain, and by considerably, it was _fucking freezing_. They decided they'd unpack everything in now so they wouldn't have to when it got colder, but by the time they finished, they're fingers were numb and noses were pink. The view was beautiful, with the mountain reflecting off of the lake's surface and gentle snowfall creating an almost romantic ambiance, but inside meant warmth and thankfully the cabin had electricity.

"Mother of god, I think I've turned into ice." Jamie mumbled as he shut the door behind them and snatched up a thick blanket. "Turn on the heater before I shatter."

Jack chuckled at him and switched on the two that they brought before grabbing his own blanket and sitting next to Jamie on the floor, snug next to the only source of heat.

"Still glad we did this?"

"Of course." Jamie replied and gave Jack a look.

"What?"

"How are you not shivering uncontrollably?"

"What can I say, Frost is my last name."

Jamie chuckled and looked around. It wasn't very big, but it was nice and cozy. There was one window and one medium sized bed and an electrical socket, but other than that, it was bare. They had brought a small table and two fold out chairs themselves, so they're stay would probably be primitive, but enjoyable.

"So... What's the plan for the weekend?" Jamie asked and looked back at Jack.

"Doing whatever we want. With no adults." Jack elbowed him. "And I brought my Playstation."

"Thank god for electricity."

* * *

That night, at around eleven, they decided to go to bed, since eleven at night, when your camping and it's cold and dark, means it's extremely late and there's really nothing else to do. So Jack and Jamie, both sharing the bed in their respectable sleeping bags, layed down and shared a bit of their body heat to make it through the night. Jamie fell asleep much later, since staring at Jack's sleeping face was a guilty pleasure he had taken up, and the next morning he felt groggy and less cheery than the white-haired teen.

"Hey, get up." Jack ordered and poked him with a fork.

Jamie slowly opened his eyes and was assaulted with the early morning sunshine that reflected off of the snow and through the window.

"Ugh, no, no wakey." Jamie pulled his sleeping bag over his head and squeezed his eyes shut. He heard Jack sigh then heard a _zzzzip_ before feeling a rush of cold air. Jack had undone his sleeping bag. "Jack, it's freezing!"

"Then get up and put on some clothes. I put them next to the heater because I'm such a nice friend."

"Nice friend my ass." Jamie mumbled, still bitter about the rude awakening, but eventually became thankful because his clothes did infact warm him up.

"Better, Princess?" Jack asked with a smirk.

"That's Mr. Princess to you." Jamie warned and pointed at Jack.

They had three days left alone in the mountains, and Jamie was praying that something would happen between them. At the same time, though, he was terrified that if something happened, it wouldn't be mutual, and the ride home would be awkward. _Very _awkward. _Extremely _awkward. Like, he would die and never be resurrected awkward.

Jack broke him out of his stupor and tossed him a thermos of coffee.

"I know it's not your favorite, but you look terrible. What time did you go to bed?"

"Same time you did, of course."

"I call bullshit. You see me? I look amazing and refreshed. You look like you got three hours of sleep."

"Okay, fine, but I was freezing. It's not my fault you can ignore the cold." Jamie took a sip of the drink and made a face. That was some bitter stuff.

"Well, I hope you sleep better tonight." Jack commented and slipped on his shoes.

"Where are you going?"

"_We're _going to take a hike."

"Awe, Jack, c'mon. It's soooo cold."

"Did we come here for nothing?"

They stared at each other for a few seconds.

"Oh, fine!" Jamie got up and slammed his blanket to the ground. Jack threw his boots at the teen, who put them on with a slight frown and tied them with a little glare at Jack, who smirked at him. And Jamie couldn't stay frustrated with him.

* * *

After a day of hiking, snowballs, shivering, and complaining, they sat in front of the heater, choosing the floor over their chairs, and talked about life. Jack learned more about Jamie's childhood and how rough it really was when his parents got a divorce and how sad he was when his dad moved out of state a few years later. Jack confessed a little more about his sister and how much he loved her and how he felt so protective of her, especially when she went deaf at age three. Then they drifted to the topic of their futures.

"Honestly, and don't make fun of me, I've always wanted to be a mythology professor."

"Mythology?" Jack asked and leaned in closer in interest.

"Hey, it's always been fascinating to me. I've probably read about a thousand books on it. Why not make a living out of it?"

"Well, I guess so." Jack smiled at him.

"What about you?"

"Me?" Jack looked up at the wooden ceiling. "I don't know. For right now, I don't really have any career dreams. I want to get into the New York Academy of Art. But mostly..." Jack sighed. "Mostly I just want to be seen."

"Be seen? Like, well known?"

"I don't know." Jack shrugged. "Maybe. But ever since what happened... With Emma... It's like I've been invisible. Like I'm a ghost." He shrugged again and look down. "I just want people to see me. I don't want to feel so... Translucent."

"Jack," Jamie leaned down so Jack couldn't help but look back at him, "I see you."

The white-haired teen felt like a balloon was filling up in his chest.

"I think you're one of the most amazing people I've ever met." Jamie grabbed Jack's hand on a whim. "I've seen you. I know you. I think you're great." He put his forehead against Jack's.

"Thank you." Jack whispered and he could feel the tears welling up. But he wouldn't cry. He couldn't cry. He wasn't sad. He was happy. Why was he tearing up?

Jamie's heart beat quickened. This was it. Jack was going to kiss him. They were going to kiss. Jamie was going to get his first real kiss.

Jack pulled back and Jamie could feel his heart sink.

"I'm really tired." Jack said and stood up.

Jamie could cry out in frustration.

"Okay," he settled with saying. "I guess I should go to bed too."

Jack smiled at him. "Yeah, we don't want another morning like today's."

Jamie changed into his pajamas and Jack quickly slipped on his while Jamie's back was turned.

They layed down on the bed in their sleeping bags, and Jack swung their biggest blanket on top of the both of them. Jamie figured that if he couldn't kiss Jack, sleeping next to him was good enough.


	9. Chapter 9

**Shout out to!**

**KaiFudo16**

**XLastForever(Oh my god. One of the greatest? You flatter me too much. I love you.)**

**Melissaur**

**Roanam**

**Alluring Alliteration**

**Tenshi Yamie-Angel of Darkness**

**Apple Republic**

**UmbrellaEl**

**AmiiStarr**

**Ryuuhana**

**katievonvanityy**

**Pineapple**** the Fourth**

**soundsoulryan**

**someonefromearth(I take the dying whale noises are a good thing? Haha. The visual cracked me up)**

**So, again, I didn't edit. Meh... Once I finish it, I just want to get it out there. Then I re-read and want to kill myself... I should get a Beta reader or something Is that what they're called? I don't know. Gah, I'm so uninformed. Anyway, I think the ending will be, uh, rather satisfying ;)**

* * *

When Jamie woke the next morning, his nose was just barely brushing Jack's. For a second, he was frozen in the spot, but then he eventually relaxed as his eyes went over Jack's face. He spotted little details that he hadn't noticed before. His eyelashes were quite long and dark, which clashed nicely with his white hair, that was slightly outgrown brown at the roots. Despite his pale, almost perfect complexion, he had a few freckles that went across the bridge of his nose. Jamie just wanted to kiss each of them.

While Jamie was thinking of all the things he could do this close to Jack, the teenager slowly opened his eyes. When he noticed how close his best friend was, his eye widened considerably and he retracted, which broke Jamie out of his day dreaming and he retracted back as well, which then made him topple out of the bed in a flurry of sheets and sleeping bag.

"God dammit," Jamie mumbled and tried to stand up, but he tripped on the blanket and fell back. Jack started to chuckle and then go into a full-blown laugh as Jamie continually tried to get up and slip. "Oh, shut up, Jack." He replied but started to laugh with him.

"Hey, what time is it?"

"I don't know," Jamie then glanced at his watch. "it's seven-thirty."

Jack quickly got up and slipped on his shoes and jacket before exiting the cabin. Jamie looked at the ajar door in confusion before doing the same and coming up behind his friend.

"What's up?" He asked, but Jack choose to ignore him. "Dude, what are you looking at?"

Jack pointed up at the mountain and the trees. Jamie squinted, but still didn't see anything.

"Yeah... Your point is?"

Jack stayed silent as the sun started to rise and then paint the sky in red and orange. Jamie could admit it; the sight was beautiful.

"Wow," Jamie said and looked at Jack, who was enraptured with the view.

They spent the next few minutes, just staring, until the blue started to leak over the top of the mountain, and the magic left.

"It's my favorite time of the day." Jack stated, still looking at the mountain.

"Sunrises are pretty beautiful."

"No... It's not really the sunrise. It's the silhouette of the things against it. When they're void of color. How everything turn black when the sun comes up. I think that's beautiful."

Jamie looked at Jack who was at his side, and the teenager looked back from the corner of his eye.

"Does that make any sense?"

Jamie smiled. "Yeah."

"We have to go back tomorrow."

"Ugh, don't remind me."

"What should we do today?"

"I have no idea. But it's warmer." Jamie commented.

"Yeah." Jack looked back at the mountain. "That would be nice to paint."

"Did you bring your stuff?"

"Well... yeah, but we should just do something together."

"No, no, you brought your paint, so obviously you want to. And I love watching you paint. Don't say it's creepy, okay? It's actually pretty amazing."

Jack gave him a sideways grin.

"Are you sure?"

"Of course."

Jamie helped Jack set up the table and the paint and canvas. Since Jack didn't really like to paint sitting, Jamie brought out one chair for himself.

Jack started with painting the outline of the mountain, then moved to the lake, then the skeletons of the trees. After he mapped out the scene, he began to blend together the right colors for the water and greenery. Jamie watched in amazement as the canvas began to turn into a lifelike rendition of the wildlife before them. The shading and blending was so spot on that Jamie couldn't believe that someone could be that good at painting. The trees looked so realistic, and the water was so beautifully created that it looked like you could dip your finger in it.

When Jack had finished, five hours had gone by in absolute silence.

"That's... that's amazing." Jamie breathed out. Jack just smiled and set down his paint brush. His hands were covered with gray, blue, and green paint smudges.

"You like it?"

"I love it." Jamie said earnestly.

"You can have it."

"What? Oh, n-no, I couldn't. It's amazing! You should keep it."

"But I want you to have it. You sat with me the whole time. It's been hours. I know that's not easy."

"I couldn't, Jack." Jamie said and shook his head.

"No, you have to. It's a gift. I'll throw it in the lake if you don't keep it, okay?" Jack smirked at him.

"Are you sure?"

"Dead sure."

Jamie hesitated before standing up and getting a better look at it. It was perfection.

"Jack... I don't know what to say."

"Just say thanks and take it." Jack said and nudged him with his elbow. When Jamie looked at him, he was grinning.

"Thanks," Jamie whispered, still in amazement.

"You're welcome."

For the rest of the day, they layed around the cabin, until Jack decided to go out in the snow and lay in it. Jamie thought he was crazy, but Jack claimed it was one of his favorite things to do, so the brown haired teen joined him with a small shake of the head. The spent a while like that, looking at the sky that was void of snowflakes, and just talked without looking at each other.

"I think this is the happiest I've ever been in my life." Jack said simply and Jamie himself felt like he was floating.

"Me too," he replied, and he believe he actually meant it.

* * *

On Monday afternoon, they had to pack up and head out. Both of them weren't too ecstatic about it, but they couldn't spend forever it the mountains. But they had _three _weeks of winter break, so it cushioned the blow significantly.

Jack dropped off Jamie at his house, taking a few minutes to help him unpack and say hello to Sophie and Mrs. Bennett, before making the short trip to his house and carrying in his duffel bag. When he walked through the door, his mom was up in a flash.

"Oh, sweetie, welcome home! We missed you so much!" She hugged him tightly.

"Mom, I'm not coming back from the war. We just went to the lake."

"Oh, shut up and hug me." He complied to her demand.

"Look at who's here." His dad commented as he walked in.

"Hey dad." Jack greeted, but didn't detach himself from his mom.

"Hey son. How was the lake?"

"Really awesome. At first it was really cold, but the weather warmed up a bit." Jack shrugged and Anna finally let go. "We had a lot of fun."

"How's my car?"

"Gassed up and cleaned."

"That's my boy." Mark said with a smile and took the keys from his son.

"Now if you excuse me, I've got to take a shower." Jack left to go to the bathroom; a luxury he had missed greatly.

He turned on the hot water, then the cold, to create a perfect mix of temperatures. He stripped off his clothes and stepped over the lip of the tub. The water felt like an old friend to his grimy skin, and he sighed lightly at the feeling. For a few minutes, he just stood with the water falling down his body. Then, deciding he was done with feeling disgusting, he started to wash his hair. Then he moved to the rest of him. And he took a few more minutes to just stand there. And then he stopped the water and wrapped himself in his towel. Before he walked out the door, he took out his contacts (which had been bugging him for the whole trip) and stared at the mirror that he wiped clear of fog. He looked at his hair, and his brown eyes, and down his chest and to his arms. There were several pink lines that cut across his skin, and he used one of his fingers to press on one of them. It felt like a bruise, but it wasn't good enough. It didn't feel real. He hadn't cut in a week, and hadn't had a cigarette for longer. His body was feeling twitchy.

Jack glanced down the hall to make sure it was clear before slipping into his room and clasping on his bed. Oh how it felt so good. Not that sleeping next to someone wasn't a nice change of pace, but there was something beautiful about your own bed. He stayed there for ten minutes before slipping on some boxers and grabbing his razor.

He wasn't stressed. It wasn't like that this time. He didn't have to be stressed. He could be happy.

He just had to do it. And he couldn't stop.

* * *

Jamie and him hung out a few times before Jack remembered that he actually had some homework. On Thursday, he invited Jamie over to help him with his drawing final practice. It was easy, and something he didn't feel like he had to procrastinate on because art was something he liked. It wasn't like his English paper that he had to get done.

Jack flicked on his lamp and also pushed aside the curtains to get some natural light in as Jamie walked in and slid against the bed to sit on the floor. Before Jack joined him, he grabbed his sketch book, provided by Mr. Reyes for the class, and his pencils.

"Okay, well, we're doing face studies." Jack started and crossed his legs.

"And you want to draw my face because I'm so good looking?"

"No," Jack chuckled at the suggestive look on Jamie's face, "I just didn't want to draw my mom."

"How disappointing." Jamie pouted. "Well, how do you start a face? Draw a circle? Sketch some lines?"

"Draw a oval then figure out the facial shape." Jack said and then began to draw out a very light oval.

"What's my face shape?"

"I'd say oval." Jack said after studying Jamie's face. He then nodded. "Yeah, oval."

He began to draw the subtle jaw line.

"What about yours?" Jamie cocked his head and leaned closer.

"Um, I don't know. I don't really study my face." He looked up and was surprised to see Jamie's face so close.

Jamie quirked his lip in thought.

"Maybe rectangular." He said and lifted up his hand to touch the other's jaw. He let it stay for a few seconds before setting his gaze on Jack's blue eyes. They stared at each other, then both moved back at the same time, with identical light blushes.

"Uh, yeah, maybe." Jack replied and coughed. "Are you ready then?"

"Uh, yeah, totally. Start drawing." Jamie said and mentally slapped himself.

The chatted as Jack drew, and Jamie was getting more and more excited to see what it would look like. For now, though, the picture was hidden as Jack leaned over it and drew intensely, often glancing up studying his face. Jamie felt sort of turned on, and felt a little bad about it, but Jack looked pretty hot with that look on his face. Total concentration and passion.

Oh god, he had an artist fetish. People could make terrible pornos about that.

Jack finished after a while and turned the book towards Jamie.

"Oh, wow, it's so... Lifelike."

Jack offered it to him, and Jamie took it.

"There's a few pages."

Jamie flipped through it, and saw several eyes, noses, facial shapes, and lips before two of his whole face; one lightly doodled out and one in full detail. It was like looking in a black and white mirror. He even got his light scar on his jaw.

"This is amazing. You amaze me." Jamie smiled.

Jack shrugged in embarrassment. "It's not _that_ good."

"No, really, it is." Jamie insisted and gave him back the book. "You're going to ace that final."

Jack smiled back at him.

"So what should we do now?"

"What we always do?"

"Video games," they said at the same time and broke out in identical grins.

Jamie ended up spending the night, and the next night, and they spent their time indoors except for a short trip to the Coffee Cave for lunch. After Jamie had left on Sunday, Jack layed on his bed, a favorite pastime that had grown over the past months, and thought about how much his life had changed in such a short amount of time. Just that August, when he had first arrived in Burgess, he had been an angry, emotionally wrecked teenager with a heavy burden taken root inside him. He had been alone and felt so invisible. Then, just on the first day, everything had changed. Jamie had been one of his greatest blessings. Jamie made him forget, if just for a little while, about how much he really hated himself.

And then it clicked.

Jamie wasn't just his best friend. Jamie was his saviour. Jamie meant more to him than just a friend.

He loved Jamie.

He was in love with Jamie.


	10. Chapter 10

**Heeeeyyyy, we're in the double digits! Whoot whoot! Chapter ten is here!**

**On a rather depressing note, crazy shit's been happening in my neck of the woods. There was a mall shooting, the pet store in my town caught fire this morning, along with the mill, and I heard a kid in my grade got in a car wreck. How crazy? Dear lord.**

**On a less depressing note, but still a little sad, I was wrong. Winter break's not next week :(**

**On a not depressing note, I found out I'm type B Negative blood! Teehee, second rarest blood type. I'm so cool.**

**On a thankful note, you guys just make me feel so awesome. Really. Whenever I read your reviews they just make me so happy. I've got some self confidence issues and whatnot, but with you all, I feel so special. even more than my blood type. I just love you and I hope I don't disappoint.**

**I'm out of notes.**

**Shout out to!**

**AmiiStarr**

**Tenshi Yami-Angel of Darkness **

**SkyHighFan(He loved him, but wasn't in love. Now it's somethin' more, yay.)**

**raven2547(I've never actualy watched one of his videos, but I know about happy trees :) I took one of "his" classes and painted a similar scene. Though that was when I was in elemetary school, so it isn't as great as Jack's... Haha, but I'm sure I could do better now. Anyway... I'm rambling about myself. On to the story!)**

**Apple Republic (Aw, your reviews make me smile :) )**

**HyoomanBean**

**XLastForever(So that means you'll *takes sunglasses off* last forever as a... uh, reviewer... *badum tiss* *crickets*No? Okay...)**

**Camila Can't Think(Oh my god, thank you so much!)**

**The Singing Maiden( I am not a ninja... I'm a update pirate. Uh... Yeah. Okay, now I'm just saying things.)**

**someonefromearth**

**KaiFudo16**

**BAYBAY841**

**youdon'tknowme06**

**Honoka-Chan(Why thank you so much! I loves the reviews. It's not awkward. A real living character is something that I am for, even though they've already been invented, but thanks :) )**

**ChellyErinClark**

**ThePreppyEmo**

**kastiyana(I don't know what to say, but thank you so much. Aw, you make me blush!)**

**Keyblades of Oblivion(I feel like Jack being an artist is the only way for him to be. I dunno, he just kinda seems like that. And the scene where he's proving that the Easter Bunny's still alive and turns the window fog bunny alive? That just solidified it to me. And painting's amazing. I LOVE painting. And don't mind rambling, it's okay :) PS: I love your user name)**

**Clio Ying (I feel like some authors really over look the parents or make them out to be terrible. Parents are usually cool. I'm glad you like them)**

**TastyCannibal(Though your user name makes me raise an eyebrow, your review makes me giggle too. I fucking love you too.)**

**fuoco(guest) (Look forward to? Aww! You're too kind)**

**MsMorningBird**

**ThePreppyEmo(Again, review makes me shmile. Yes, shmile.)**

**Decadent-Magpie(Jack and I share a lot of things. That love of that time of the day is one of them. And painting. And cutting. And being pan. And other things. Now, to explain a bit, I believe that to make something realistic, you should base it off things you know. I didn't put my characteristics into him just because I obviously know them, but I feel like they can be put inside him. It fits him. Some of me is in Jamie too. Some of my ex-boyfriend is in Jamie. Some of my best friend is in Jack. Just, you know, putting that in there. It can also be a writing tip to anyone who's interested in improving their writing. Don't be afraid to put some personal attributes into your characters and settings. The Coffee Cave is based off of my favorite coffee shop and the school's modeled a bit after mine. It assures that I know what I'm talking about.)**

**XphiaDP**

**Mallory Mirkov**

**Okay, that took forever... Anyway, enjoy this new chapter.**

* * *

The next day, and for the rest of the week, Jack tried to reason with himself. It wasn't true, was it? Jamie was just the first person to show him compassion and believe in him. It was... natural? to think that he had some sort of feelings for him. They shared a special bond. Jamie was his best friend. His feelings were platonic, right? Right? Jack tried so desperately to think that, but the more he tried, the less he felt it was true. He couldn't help it. He loved Jamie.

It's not like it wouldn't be impossible for them to get together. Jamie wasn't straight. They had a chance. Jack just didn't want anything to be awkward or go wrong. Jack didn't want to tell Jamie how he felt and then have the other reject him. Or worse; them get into some sort of relationship and have it crash and fail. He wished he was the kind of person who could let these things go. But he had to think about the worst possible outcomes.

Jamie probably didn't even like him. Just because he was gay, and Jack was pan, didn't mean that there was a mutual attraction. Sure, Jack was artistic and tall and attractive, but so what? Jack liked to think he was sort of modest, and not everyone wanted him. Most of the time he was ignored. Jamie could find him completely unappealing.

Plus, there was the whole homophobia issue. Getting into a relationship would be a bad idea.

But now that Jack _really_ thought about it, he couldn't imagine being without Jamie. As a friend, or even something more. Jack knew risks have to be taken in order to find the truth. But Jack also knew that risks can ruin. But he wasn't the type of person to run away from problems. He could face it head on, by telling Jamie. He could keep it inside him and let it eat him away until he cracked. If he told Jamie and it wasn't mutual, at the least it would be awkward for a bit then Jack would get over it, because something really changes when you know the person really isn't interested. Or Jamie could leave him. Or Jamie, by some miracle, could like him back.

Maybe Jack didn't really love Jamie. Maybe he only liked him. But either way, he _knew _there was an attraction there. Jamie was an amazing person. He was attractive, yes, but he was kind and funny and generous. He was just a _good person_. And Jack... well, Jack wasn't. Jack didn't deserve Jamie.

Jack sat on the edge of his bed with his head in his hands. He had been battling inside his head for hours. It was eating away at his guts, causing knots to tie up and his heartbeat to quicken. His body was telling him to confess, or else he'd die. His brain was caught in the middle. He really wished he had someone to talk to.

Then it hit him.

Jack got up and grabbed his phone from his desk. Quickly scrolling, he found what number he was looking for and hit 'Call'. For a few moments it just rang until he heard the tell tale click of it picking up.

"Hello?" Jack heard the thick Russian accent on the other side of the receiver.

"Uncle North? Hey," Jack said nervously, "how's it going?"

"Good, nephew. Good." North said with a deep chuckle. "How is it going with you?"

"Oh, you know. High school, stress, stuff like that." Jack responded and sat down. He hadn't talked to his Uncle since Thanksgiving. Usually they kept in contact rather well, but Jack had been busy as of late.

"Everything is alright, yes?" Jack knew what he was hinting at.

"Yeah, I've been fine. I've actually met someone, and he's really cool. I've been getting better."

"That is magnificent!" He said with enthusiasm and Jack chuckled. His Uncle was great.

"Actually, the reason I called you was because of the guy I met... I... I need some advice." Jack started. He wasn't feeling awkward about the fact that he was having 'girl talk' with his Uncle North. He already knew about his sexuality and was completely supportive. He was awkward because he didn't quite know what to think himself.

"Yes," he asked and Jack imagined him sitting at his big desk with an intent stare.

"I've been struggling with my feelings towards him. I can't... Well, okay, I _know _I like him, I just don't know what to do about it."

North made a thoughtful noise, expressing that he was listening and thinking, but wanted Jack to continue.

"He's really great, but I don't want to ruin anything between us. He's gay, so that's not the problem, but I can't be sure if he likes me. Oh, god, I sound so stupid." Jack shook his head. He could feel his cheeks burning, but it was too late to take it back.

"You know what I say?" North started but didn't ask for an answer. "Look at life with wonder. Do not restrict yourself. Tell him, or else you will not know."

Jack thought about it for a second. He really didn't want to restrict his life: after all, he _was _living for two people.

"Do you really think it's the best idea?"

"I feel it in my belly."

Jack smiled. If Uncle North's belly was telling him it was the best idea, he had to go through with it.

"Thanks," Jack smiled and looked at the staff that was now hanging on his wall, "really, it means a lot."

"Not a problem, little Jackie." He said and then Jack heard some noises in the background and a sound that could've been mistaken as a trumpet. "I must go, but take care."

"'Bye, don't work too hard." Jack replied and grinned as he heard his uncle ordering some people around before it clicked off.

Jack's uncle was probably the coolest person on Earth. He was his mom's oldest brother, and even though they hadn't grown up together, they were considerably close. Their parents got a divorce when Anna was a little over one, and her father moved back to Russia with her brother, and she stayed in New York with her mother and her older sister. It was an odd predicament, but eventually Nicholas moved back to America when he was twenty five and Anna was twenty one. He still had his Russian accent, something he'd hang on to for the rest of his life, and now he was Jack's devoted Uncle. Jack thought that maybe it was because he felt guilty for not being there for his sister, and he was trying to make up for it, but either way, he was Jack's favorite uncle. On the other side, though, Uncle Bunny was Uncle North's best friend. North went to college in the states, and became close friend with E. Aster Bunnymund(a.k.a Uncle Bunny), who eventually married their sister and became a part of the family. He wasn't Jack favorite relative, but they had their moments, and Thanksgiving and Easter was really all the contact they had.

But nonetheless, Jack's mind had been made up.

He was going to tell Jamie how he felt. Or... something of the sort.

* * *

Jack decided that ignoring and blowing Jamie off for the past week wasn't acceptable any longer. Romantic feelings aside, he missed Jamie and had been feeling extremely lonely.

_Hey, you busy today?_

After a tense second, his phone dinged.

_oh _ur_ not busy 2day? i guess i can be important 4 once_

_C'mon, don't be like that. I'm sorry, I've just had stuff to do. _

_fine. im just shitting you. what do u want 2 do?_

_The usual. Just hang out._

Jack really wanted to say '_I have something to tell you.'_, but he figured that'd be too intense.

_ill be over in 10_

_Okay._

Jack went into the living room to wait, informing his parents that Jamie was on his way, and sat on the couch with his mind racing.

He couldn't do this. He wasn't going to do it. It was too quick. Oh god, what was he worrying about? This was silly. It's just a crush, it's stupid. This was stupid. He was stupid. Jamie wasn't stupid. Jamie was amazing. Jamie was fucking hot. Jamie made him want to just... He didn't know. Jamie made him want to do a lot of things. Jesus Christ, Jack was going crazy. No big deal, no big deal, no big deal, no big deal-it was a big deal. No it wasn't. Yes it was. No. Jack was so stupid!

There was a knock and then the door opened.

"Honey, I'm home!" Jamie called out.

"Welcome back, sweetie. It's been awhile, hasn't it?" Anna said and looked at Jack, who gave her a panicked warning look. She raised her eyebrow but let it go.

"Yeah, yeah. Someone didn't want me around I guess." Jamie teased and sat on the arm of the couch. "Do you even recognize me?" He gave him a sideways look.

"You're such a drama queen."

Jamie shrugged and smiled at Jack.

"The queen demands a sandwich."

Jack rolled his eyes but got up anyway and went into the kitchen. Jamie trailed after him, humming some song, and the white haired teen could practically feel the heat radiating off of him, even though he wasn't standing very close. Maybe it wasn't heat. Or, at least body heat.

Jack knew that Jamie liked his animal proteins, but he figured he could deal with what they had. The younger teen did infact take the sandwich with grace and thanks, and they sat at the kitchen table for several minutes.

"So, how've you been?" Jamie asked after he had finished and brushed the crumbs off of his lap.

"You know, I've been fine." Jack quirked his lip. "Thinking about things. What about you?"

"Thinking as well." Jamie nodded his head slowly.

Silence.

"Have you seen Donnie Darko?" Jamie asked quickly.

"I love that movie."

"Shall we watch it?"

"Absolutely."

They both got up and made their way to Jack's room, where he had recently gotten a small T.V. and set up the Playstation. They spent the next two hours watching Jake Gyllenhaal and Jena Malone.

"Did you hear she's going to be in the new Hunger Games movie?"

"Oh really? Who's she playing?"

"Johanna Mason."

"Oh, okay."

Silence.

The movie went on and then finished.

"The ending always gets me."

"Yeah. It's a really mad world, isn't it?"

"Yeah."

Silence.

Someone could cut the tension with a butter knife.

Jack knew why _he_ was tense. He had no idea why Jamie was giving off that vibe. Maybe since he had been kind of ignoring him for a week. But they were closer than that, right? One week didn't mean anything, right?

Jack sat up straighter and steeled himself. This was it. He couldn't take it. It was the time to confess.

"Jamie..." Jack started and he could feel his palms become sweaty and his heart started to pound.

"Yeah?" Jamie looked over at him. His body was still facing towards the television, but his shoulders and head were turned and eyes fixed on him innocently. For some reason, this struck Jack as kind of cute. His face heated up.

"I've got something to tell you."

Jamie then angled his body towards the other.

"Yeah?" He asked again.

"I-I, uh, I..." Jack inhaled through his nose deeply.

"Yes, Jackson?" Jamie gave him a look and smiled lightly. Jack winced at that name.

"I... I actually didn't like the Hunger Games movie." Jack blurted out and felt like slapping himself. Oh god, he was such a wimp!

And the worst part was that he really _did _like the movie!

"Oh," Jamie said, with slight disappointment, "I thought it was good. The camera stuff was kind of weird, but it was still entertaining." Jamie shrugged.

"Uh, yeah. The camera stuff. Couldn't get passed that." Jack bit his lip and looked down at his lap.

"Oh look, Mean Girls." Jamie commented. "Mind if I?"

"Go ahead." Jack said as he was berating himself.

"Cool," Jamie clicked on it, and they spent another few hours with Lindsay Lohan.

Thankfully, Jack's mood was lifted whenever Jamie laughed and giggled, and for now, everything was okay.


	11. Chapter 11

**I firstly want to say, my heart goes out to the victim's and family effected by the Connecticut tragedy. Something so terrible should never happen now, or again. The country of America is in such a messed up state right now. I know that in our school, there's already been bomb and shooting threats, and if wherever you live is in a similar mix up, please, try to stay safe and find or continue things that give you joy and peace. I love you guys.**

**Shout out to:**

**SkyHighFan**

**kastiyana(Thank you for your review. Actually, it gave me some ideas for this chapter. And it's very flattering about what you said. Sixteen is pretty young, I guess, haha. But even in ****just**** two years, my writing's gotten a lot better. I hope it still improves yet :) )**

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* * *

Jack could admit it: he hated himself for not fessing up. But who could blame him? It wasn't some silly little crush that he could giggle about and get over when he saw a cute girl or guy walk down the hall. Jamie mattered to him. And if someone mattered to you, you didn't want to scare them away. It would have to be tactful.

Jack wasn't completely ignorant when it came to romance. He read books.

But how do you find out if a guy really actually likes you?

Oh god, Jack was hopeless. He had dealt with all the things life pushed at him. He had had something to help him along the way. This was new. This was odd. This was stressful.

He was at a loss. But he knew if he didn't do anything soon, he'd explode.

* * *

Jamie had been ecstatic when Jack invited him over. He had been worrying himself sick when Jack had ignored his texts and hadn't even Facebooked him back. For a second, or more like three days, he had a pit in his stomach. Jack knew. He _knew_. _He knew his secret_. He felt like throwing up. He felt truly ill. And Jamie couldn't shake the feeling that was prickling at his neck.

Sure, he hadn't been exactly _discreet_, but, well, you know. Sometimes it's hard for some people to think someone likes them. Jack could be oblivious. Or at least Jamie hoped.

But Jamie _knew _and _felt _that something was off when he went over though. There was a wall. A glass wall. He could see Jack, but he couldn't hear him. If that made any sense. It made sense to Jamie.

And the bull about the Hunger Games? Jamie knew that Jack loved that movie. He was hiding something.

Jamie sat on the couch, watching his little sister color and complimenting her when she asked for it. He had his knees pulled to his chest and a slight pout on his face.

Mrs. Bennett looked at her son from around the corner. He really looked like something was troubling him.

"Honey, can you come here?" She called out to him and he startled at looked up.

"Huh?"

"In the kitchen. Come on," she motioned him over with her hand, "I need to talk to you."

Jamie walked in a slightly daze and sat at the table. His mom sat across from him, like they did when Jamie was trying to get advice.

"Honey, what's been going on?"

"Going on? What do you mean?" Jamie asked and crossed his arms.

"You've been acting weird. You not talking as much." She leaned forward and whispered the next part. "Is this about the person you were talking about?"

"I-uh, no, mom." Jamie flustered. "It's nothing. School and stuff."

"School's out for another week." She pursed her lips. "Don't lie to me."

Jamie sighed heavily. "Okay, yeah, I'm having stupid relationship problems. Or, lack thereof."

"Well, tell me what's got you so down."

"Mixed messages I guess. I think something could happen. H-They're hiding something. I don't want things to get weird, but mom," he became extremely sincere, "I really like them."

"Jamie, sweetie," his mom now became slightly nervous, "is the person you're talking about Jack?"

There was an extremely awkward silence. That lasted for way too long.

"If it is, that's okay. Okay? I don't care. All I want is for you to be happy." She reached across the table to put her hand on Jamie's arm. He was still frozen on the spot. "You can tell me. I love you, no matter what."

"M-mom..." Jamie looked down and took a breath. "Mom, I'm sorry."

"No, no, don't be sorry. There's nothing to be sorry about." She insisted.

"I... I'm sorry for not being able to tell you." He shook his head.

"It's okay. It's no big deal."

He coughed.

"I really do like Jack though. Really a lot."

This is what she had really been dreading. Her poor boy, liking some straight boy that could hurt him in more ways than one.

"Jamie, sweetie, sometimes things don't work out the way you want them to. You have to be careful around here. People aren't so understanding. Even the people you really care about."

"Mom, Jack's not going to beat me up about it."

"Sometimes people will surprise you-"

"Jack's pansexual. He's not going to beat me up."

Mrs. Bennett looked at Jamie, confused.

"Pan's like bisexual."

"Oh, okay. Why didn't you say that to begin with?"

"Mom, not important."

"Sorry, sorry. Um, I'm sorry Jamie. I've got nothing. If you've got a chance, take it. But be careful. And if something happens between you two, be extra careful. You know what happens around here."

"I know..." Jamie sighed. Mrs. Bennett stood up and extended her arms to him.

"C'mere and give me a hug." She said with a smile. Jack returned it and rose to give her the hug. She squeezed him tightly before letting him go.

"You know, you should tell him soon. I hate seeing your face like that." She bopped his nose with her finger, like she did when he was a little boy. "Oh, honey, you've grown so much." She pouted.

"Mom, no, don't get all sentimental with me, please." Jamie begged.

"I just love you so much." She hugged him one more time. "Now, go do whatever you teenagers do."

"Thanks mom." Jamie said and smiled at her. She nodded, and Jamie walked out and to his bedroom.

Okay, so he'd do it. And he'd do it tomorrow, no regrets.

* * *

When Jack woke the next morning, he felt like throwing up. After his failure to confess the other day, he concluded that night that he'd do it the next day. This was going to happen. He'd do it. He'd grow a pair and do it.

He took a long and thoughtful shower, ate his breakfast slowly, watched two episodes of his favorite show, painted an abstract picture, drew two more Jamies in his sketchbook, ate lunch, then planned out how he'd fess up. He guessed finding out what Jamie thought would be a good start.

He was literally about to invite Jamie over when he got a text from, speak of the devil, Jamie.

_mom and sis r gone. wanna come over?_

Well, he guessed that Jamie's house would be okay too.

_Yeah, okay. See you soon._

Jack wanted to get there as soon as possible, so he bypassed looking in the mirror to check his appearance and said a very brief goodbye to his parents. When he had finally came up to Jamie's front door, his heart was pounding.

He was acting like such a girl.

But he lifted his arm and knocked on the door twice. A few seconds later, it opened.

"I told you, you can just walk right in." Jamie said before looking up. His eyes widened. "W-what?"

Jack started to feel self-conscious.

"What? What's wrong?" He touched his face and looked down at himself.

"You... Your eyes." Jamie looked straight at him with a dumbfounded expression. "Are you wearing colored contacts?"

"Y-yeah..." Jack thought for a moment. Oh, god, no, he wasn't! He forgot!

"It... it looks different. Not bad, but different." Jamie commented. "But why?"

"Uh, how about we go inside?"

"Oh, yeah, yeah, of course." Jamie walked into the living room and sat on the loveseat. Jack followed him after closing the door and sat next to him.

"Um, actually, this is my natural eye color." Jack said and gave him a guilty smile. "I guess I forgot my contacts."

Jamie looked at him with confusion.

"Wait wait wait-you're telling me that you have brown eyes? And you wear blue contacts? All the time?"

"Well, yeah, actually." Jack suddenly felt silly.

"But... why?"

Jack thought about it for a second.

"I just... I just wanted people to notice me." Jack looked down at his lap. "I didn't want to be invisible. It's not like it helped."

"I notice you."

Jack looked up at Jamie, who was looking at him.

"I noticed you right when you walked into the classroom."

Silence. But it wasn't awkward. It was thoughtful, on both parts.

"I like your natural eye color. And I bet you look good with brown hair too."

"Jamie... You're... You're really amazing, you know that, right?"

Jamie looked away and shrugged with a blush.

"I'm okay."

"No, really," Jack tilted Jamie's face back towards him with his hand. Even after he began to talk again, he kept it there, "only one other person's ever meant so much to me. She's gone now. But you're here, and you mean... You mean a lot to me. No one's ever believed in me like you have. You're just... You're just... Ugh, I can't explain it. I just care about you so much."

Jack sucked in a breath.

"Do you want to know something?"

Jamie looked at him expectantly. This was it. Jack felt the same way. Dear lord, Jack felt the same way!

"Yeah," Jamie said and stared intently into Jack's brown eyes.

Jack hooked his fingers under the bottom of his hoodie and pulled it up and over his head. Okay, okay, that's one way to start things.

When Jack tossed it to the ground he put his bare arms in front of him. Now that Jamie thought of it, he had never seen Jack without his usual blue hoodie. Now he knew why.

"Jack... Oh my god..." Jamie looked up at his friend before gently grabbing his arm and bringing it up. There were scars and cuts all over it. "Jack... What...Did you do this to yourself?"

The answer was obvious. He just didn't want to believe it.

"Yeah..." Jack replied shyly with shame and embarrassment.

"_Why_?" Jamie felt like crying. That was terrible.

"I just... It just happened one day. Ever since, I couldn't stop. It made me feel better. After what happened to Emma... I just hated myself."

"Jack..." Jamie mumbled and then drew him into a tight hug. "Jack, you shouldn't feel that way. You really need to stop."

"I... it's getting better." Jack moved back so he could look at Jamie. He put their foreheads together, just like Jamie had done at the cabin by the lake, and closed his eyes with a sigh. "You're helping me."

They sat there for several moments, both of them with their eyes closed.

Jack pulled back slowly.

"You've really helped me. Thank you."

"Of course." Jamie responded. "I... you know... I love you." He whispered. It could be taken as a friend love. But he didn't really mean it that way.

"I love you too." He whispered back.

For a second, Jamie thought Jack was going to close up again. For a second, Jamie thought he himself was going to break down and slam his lips on Jack's. He was sure wrong.

After a short pause, Jack cautiously lifted his hand to cup Jamie's cheek, he breathed through his nose, and leaned it.

At first, it didn't register with Jamie that the other was getting closer. Not until soft lips were shyly brushing his and his heart stopped. There was barely any pressure, while both of them were overworking their brains to process what was going on, but Jamie snapped back into reality when he felt Jack start to pull away.

He leaned in closer, so now it was a legitimate kiss, and wrapped his arms around Jack's neck; his bare arms coming into contact with Jack's cool skin. It felt nice. It felt amazing. It felt electrical.

And most of all, it felt unreal. But beautifully unreal. So unreal that it couldn't be anything but real.

Jack felt amazing pressed up against him. They weren't doing anything special with the kiss. But it really _felt_ special. And Jack wasn't pulling away. In fact, Jack ran his hand through the other's hair and wrapped the other arm around his waist. All in all, it couldn't've lasted more than two minutes. But it felt like an eternity.

They both pulled back at the same time; completely breathless and light headed.

Jack's head was spinning. He kissed Jamie. Jamie kissed him back. They kissed. Jamie knew. And now Jack knew. They both knew. They were looking at each other. No one could say anything. They both were afraid the other would shoot them down.

"I-I..."Jack stuttered and Jamie nodded.

"Yeah..."

"That was, uh..."

"Yeah, I know..."

"Wow," they both said.

There was nothing to say. For once, they knew what the other was thinking.

* * *

**I've got something to confess, guys. I wrote this RIGHT after I posted chapter ten. I hope you're not too mad that I've been holding out. **

**Read, fav, follow, review ;)**


	12. Chapter 12

**Sorry guys, it's been a bit. I've been a little busy with school, but it's FINALLY WINTER BREAK! Yay! **

**I had a bit of writers block... Heh... Sorry about that. So you're stuck with this crappy, short chapter. I hope you still like it though. And remember guys, there's no need to message me to ask when I'm going to update next. I shouldn't be longer than two weeks between updates, and considering I'm me, that's good.**

**200th reviewer (not a guest)gets a one-shot/drabble written by me. The 50th reviewer's(Mallory Mirkov) story is almost done and should be up tomorrow! Yay!**

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**I just want to say thank you to everyone. You guys are great.**

* * *

"I had no idea... This is... Wow." Jamie muttered.

"So you too?"

"Yeah, I mean... Why didn't you tell me?"

"Why didn't _you_ tell _me_?"

"I was... I was afraid."

"I was too." Jack sighed.

"We're so awkward."

They both laughed a little too loud, but considering they were both nervous, it was understandable.

"So... Well..."

"Yeah?"

"What now?"

Jack thought for a moment. What did it mean then? Jamie knew now. Jamie felt the same way. God, he hadn't thought it through.

"I don't know." He replied and Jamie looked a little disappointed.

"I like kissing you." Jamie offered and Jack laughed lightly.

"I like kissing you too."

They sat there in silence, just looking at each other, trying to plan out what really could happen between them.

"We should talk it out, I guess."

"Yeah," Jack closed his eyes for a second. He thought.

"How exactly do you feel about me?" Jamie asked shyly.

"I... I know I like you." Jack said lamely. "You're great."

"But...?"

"There's no buts. I like you. I can't stop thinking about you. I just don't want to mess things up. I don't want to... I don't want to lose you." Jack sighed. "Do I make any sense?"

"You make plenty of sense." Jamie laughed airily. "I've never done anything like this before. You're the first person I've ever _really_ liked."

"I haven't dated much myself," Jack shrugged. "But I guess we can figure it out."

They smiled at each other. It felt terribly cheesy, but they didn't worry about it. This was between them.

"I'm going to kiss you again, okay?"

"Okay."

Jack leaned in and pressed his lips to Jamie's.

He didn't know how things would work out. He didn't know if this would all crash and burn. But he did know that he was happy with Jamie, and that was all that mattered.

* * *

Jack left after Jamie's mom and Sophie came back. They promised each other that they'd meet up the next day to _really_ talk: something that made Jack both excited and queasy. His body was still buzzing. He felt good. He was great. Things were great. Jamie was especially great.

Jack couldn't stop grinning. His parents gave him a weird look when he walked through the door, but they were pleased that we wasn't frowning or anything of the sort.

When he plopped down onto his bed, crossing his arms behind his head, he then realized that he forgot his hoodie on Jamie's floor. Damn.

But it didn't really matter. He didn't think anything could damper his mood.

Until he remembered that he had exposed his big secret to Jamie.

He felt like ice water had been poured all over him. Nonononono, that was a mistake! He shouldn't've done that! Jamie was going to think he was some sort of freak. Or suicidal. He was going to worry too much over it.

_Jack, you're such an idiot._

It was a good idea at the time. He was trying to be honest and open with him. Having a successful relationship with someone meant honesty and trust. Jack sat up and dropped his head in his hands. Well, at least he found out now on purpose, instead of later on accident. That would be worse.

Still, Jack felt in his gut that something was going to bite him back for his confession. He was happy, but he was also scared.

* * *

Jack and Jamie decided to meet at the park. The white haired teen was hesitant, extremely so, since the pond would probably be frozen over, but Jamie was persistent. No one would be around. They could talk in peace.

When Jack walked up, he saw Jamie sitting at a bench, bundled up in a thick coat and his favorite sea green trapper hat. It brought a smile to Jack's face.

"Hey," he greeted, a little shyly. Great, he was turning into a girl.

"Hey," Jamie mirrored and stood up. They stayed there for a few tense seconds. "How about we walk around? It's too close to the sidewalk."

"Yeah, okay." Jack agreed, and the started off deeper into the park. It wasn't snowing, but the weather was well below thirty degrees. Jack's mom though he was crazy for going out in just his jacket. He thought it felt nice. The wind wasn't blowing at least.

"This is a little awkward." Jamie commented as they walked, starting to divert from the cement path.

"Yeah, just a little." Jack sighed and stopped before grabbing Jamie's arm and keeping him still. "Look, Jamie, I've just got to say this: I _really_ care about you, and if we got together, that'd be fantastic. But..." He sucked in a breath. "I don't know if I'm the best person for you."

"Jack... C'mon, don't say that. You can't just kiss me and then turn around. _I like you_. Okay?" Jamie bit his lip. This wasn't going the way he wanted it too.

"I'm just... You're too special. And me? I'm... you know what I've done."

"Don't get all stupid romance novel on me. We're not Twilight characters." Jamie took a step closer to him. "You'd be a total jerk if you just left me in the cold. We can make this work, can't we?"

Jack looked at his feet. Jamie was making a point. He was going all Edward Cullen on him, and Jamie was a thousand times better than Bella.

With a quick glance around to make sure the coast was clear, Jack leaned forward and gave the other a quick peck on the lips.

"Yeah. We can."

Jamie grinned.

"Good."

Then wandered around a bit in silent, but enjoyable, company. When they finally reached the pond, Jack stiffened a little bit, but Jamie's eyes brightened and he had a childish grin.

"This was my favorite part of town when I was little. No matter what season." Jamie went closer to the frozen edge and sat on one of the rocks after brushing some snow off.

Jack heartbeat quickened. He knew he couldn't be afraid on frozen bodies of water forever, but he was still terrified of someone he loved falling through again.

The older teen made his way next to Jamie for good measure.

"It's pretty." He commented.

"Yeah..." Jamie sighed lightly.

"So, we're officially... You know... together? Right?"

"God, I hope so. All that awkwardness should pay off somehow." Jamie looked up at Jack with a grin. The other couldn't help but smile back.

"Oh, I forgot!" Jamie stood up quickly and pulled something out of his pocket. "It's your Christmas present. I know it's late, but better now than never, right?"

"Oh, u-uh, thanks. I... I didn't think to bring yours." Jack sheepishly took the offered package.

"Just open it."

"It's not an engagement ring, is it? I don't think I can settle down just yet." Jack joked and Jamie rolled his eyes.

He unrolled the paper bag and slipped his hand in. He felt a rectangle of paper and pulled it out.

In pencil, it read: 'I cordially invite you to the Bennett New Years Party'.

Around the fringe and below it were crayon scribbles.

"Sophie wanted to decorate it." Jamie said and shrugged. "It's not much, but I'm broke, and Bennett parties are the best. You'll get to meet my family. And maybe see some of the teachers there. It stops being awkward after they have a few glasses of champagne."

"I'd love to see that. I've just got to clear it up with my parents."

"Cool." Jamie smiled. "Hopefully my great uncle doesn't get drunk and go on a ranting tangent again."

"That sounds interesting."

"It is until his brother and him get at it." Jamie sighed and rolled his eyes. "They both are _extremely_ opinionated."

"My two uncles can sometimes get... really interesting. I think you'd like them though." Jack said. "Maybe you'll get to meet them sometime."

They both sat down on the rocks and talked a bit more. As two started to tick close, Jamie decided he was too cold to deal with the weather any longer, so they gathered themselves up and went to the brown haired teen's house. Mrs. Bennett made some hot chocolate, and Sophie insisted on serving it to them. Jack's cup was mostly marshmallows, piled on by the eight year old, and Jamie's had two of them.

"How come he gets more?" Jamie asked Sophie with a smile.

"Because he's sweeter." Sophie said and stole one of them off of Jack's cup.

Jack laughed and popped a few of the white treats into his mouth. He ended up spending the night, and at nine, Sophie made the three of them watch Tangled. Jack didn't mind it too much, since he got to sort of snuggle up next to Jamie, especially after Mrs. Bennett went to bed and Sophie fell asleep halfway through. But shortly after, Jamie nodded off, and Jack was stuck between them and watched the rest of the movie in silence. After the credits started to roll, he gently got up and decided to put Sophie to bed.

He scooped her up and carried her down the hall and up the stairs. Luckily her door was already open, so he slipped in and set her on her bed. Or, at least tried to. She clung to his neck, and he kneeled on her bed to try and detach her from himself. With a little laughed, he untangled her arms and tucked her blanked up and she instantly clung to her teddy bear instead. Jack smiled and stood there for a few seconds before slipping down to the living room and grinning mischievously at Jamie's sleeping form.

He slipped into the kitchen to grab a bowl then went outside, where it had started snowing a few hours previous. He scooped some in, and then went back over to where Jamie was passed out. He bit his lip to keep from laughing and took a big handful before shoving it down the others shirt. Jamie bolted up.

"Mother of- what was- Jack!" Jamie flustered and ripped his shirt off and brushed the snow off of his chest. "That's cold!"

Jack busted up laughing and set the bowl down on the table.

"Oh, haha! Your face! I'd pay to see that again."

Jamie pouted at him. "You know, there are better ways to wake me up."

"I know." Jack grinned and brushed some snow off of him, which was melting quickly.

"Freezing cold..."Jamie mumbled and snatched a blanket from the couch.

"Do you want me to warm you up?" Jack asked rather innocently and Jamie gave him a look.

"Well, you owe me."

Jack smiled kind of, well, hotly, and took a step closer to him before wrapping his arms around his shoulders and leaning in for a kiss.

Okay, Jamie would admit, getting woken up by snow did have its perks.


	13. Chapter 13

**Merry Christmas, or if you don't celebrate that, then happy 25th of December! This is an EXTREMELY short chapter, but it's a little drabble gift to you. No, it's not set aside from the story, but it's not really important to the plot. I still hope you like it.**

**IMPORTANT!: The First Time He Killed Himself, a oneshot requested by Mallory Mirkov, is up. It's sort of a prequel to this fic. If the cutting seen on chapter ten or whatever made you uncomfortable, then I don't recommend reading it, but this goes over what exactly happened to Emma that day. If you're curious or want to know more about fourteen year old, brown eyed Jack, stop by and read people :)**

**So, I have a beta now! Whoo! Though... They didn't go over this chapter, one, because it's short and I don't think it really needs betad, two, because it's Christmas and I don't want to bother them, and three, I wanted it out right now, because I couldn't wait, haha.**

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**AmazedChica(guest)**

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**KatekeyaPavlenka (Aww, you're so sweet. I hope you like this chapter despite the size)**

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* * *

Jack went home the next day completely content and a little giddy. Getting together with Jamie was definitely the best thing he had done over the past few years. He sighed happily, feeling more than a little school girly, but he ignored that and continued walking home with a smile on his face. Jamie was... wow.

It wasn't all just sexual and romantic with him. It was serious, it was friendship, it was comfort, it was longing, it was happiness. It meant so many things to Jack, who had been deprived of real human contact and compassion for too many years. He didn't know if Jamie would be weirded out by how much he _really_ liked him(and for that matter, various little quirks of Jack's). He already knew that he smoked. Jack downed his usage. He knew that he cut. Jack didn't know if he could quit that. He knew that he had lost his sister. Jack would probably never get over it, but in the foreseeable future, he knew that the burning ache could dull into a mourning, and then eventually, acceptance and remembrance.

It began to snow lightly, and Jack tilted his head back to look at the sky. It was so beautiful and surreal, he thought he might cry, fall to his knees, and thank whatever sort of power that made the earth so wonderful.

Small things like that made him joyful. And thankful. Things like Jamie made him nervously excited. Things like Jamie could leave. The snow and rain and wind and grass were constant.

Jack sat down at one of the benches that lined the highway that cut through downtown Burgess. The weren't many people out, just a few browsing the small local shops, but he thought it was better that way. The sky lightly brushing the earth with snowflakes, each their individual being, and he couldn't even marvel at how amazing it all was. Life. Things people took for granted.

What would we be without snow? Without rain? Though people complained and whined about it, mostly adults, their graceful presence would surely be missed. Jack knew that he loved all sorts of precipitate, and almost everything else about the world. Contrary to popular belief, he loved the beach too.

Jack relaxed into the chilly wood and crossed his arms over his lap. He felt at peace. He remembered to grab his blue hoodie from Jamie's, and it felt welcoming and safe around him. Like a child's favorite blanket to protect them from the darkness and things that crept around in the shadows.

His heart felt light and fluttery. His whole body felt that way, and he realized that he hadn't felt this way in many, _many_, months. He definitely missed it.

Moments like this, that slowed and panned out gracefully and completely beautiful, Jack treasured. Moments that you remembered for the rest of your life. Moments that you wanted to last forever. He felt small and insignificant, but this time, a speck on the vast world, it was okay. He felt connected to everyone, however distant and whatever state of mind they were at. He knew that many other people were having moments like this, maybe even thinking the same thing he was, and he just hoped they were as relieving and angelic as his.

He didn't want to get up. The snow began to fall a little more, making his vision blurred as they landed on his eyelashes, and he laughed lightly.

It was okay that the cold nipped lightly at his nose. It was okay that his clothes were getting wet. The world, the snow, were beautiful, and he wanted to take time to look back at it all. So many people forget what's important in life. And he wanted to be reminded of that.


	14. Chapter 14

**Yay, first chapter to be beta-d! Everyone, thank XLastForever, because they're awesome. Now you all will have quality chapters with little to no mistakes!**

**So, I hope you had a nice Christmas/December 25th. Another kind of short chapter with... little plot. I dunno what the plot is anymore, but I know it won't stay sunshine and rainbows forever. Sorry guys, but I promise, you'll get a happy ending :)**

**This story might just be really long considering how it takes me to get to anything important... But I update fastish, so, yeah.**

**Okay, am I the only one who kind of hates OCs in the RotG fandom? I've found **one** that's actually good, so if you like slash and great writing, check out The Other Guardian. I LOVE that story :) But all the other OCs I really... *shudders*. No offence to anyone who has an OC, really, but it's a pet peeve. And mother of god, the "you're in the story it's set in second person POV omg I'm Jack Frost's girlfriend" fic! ... I don't even know what to say... I'm sorry, but things... irk me. Okay, never mind, I love you all and that's all that matters. **

**Shout out to: (can't believe some of you guys reviewed that because it's so short, but I'm pleased :) )**

**ChellyErinClark**

**vampire kitty 13**

**likhitata**

**KaiFudo16**

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**XLastForever**

**Clio Ying**

**Felipe47**

**Keyblades of Oblivion**

**Orpheus Thanatos Messiah**

**Coalstorm of WindClan**

**someonefromearth**

**WARNING! This chapter may contain a surprise pairing and overdose of adorable little sister.**

* * *

After a few days, it was New Year's eve, and with that; the Bennett party. Jack's parents approved of it, making him feel a little childish since he was seventeen after all, but he sucked it up and thanked them anyway. They were both pleased that he was spending time out of the house, and teased him about needing the sun to stop looking like a ghost. He countered that the clouds blocked out the sun, but kissed his mom on the cheek and lightheartedly bid them goodbye.

"See you guys next year!" He waved and laughed as they rolled their eyes, before getting the alcohol they stashed for the celebration.

The walk over was peaceful, and it wasn't quite dark, so he could see his surroundings clearly. The streets were busy with traffic, people going to their own parties, and he smiled to himself. It wasn't snowing, but the wind was blowing, whipping his bangs into his eyes and tugging at him. He drew his arms closer around him and trudged on. Ten minutes later, he was knocking on the door, and Sophie opened it up and pounced on him.

"Jackie!" She squealed and hugged his leg. "Jackie Jackie!"

He chuckled and picked her up before walking in and toeing the door shut.

"Excited?"

She nodded. He thought it was cute that no matter what was going on, children could sense excitement and adjust to it.

"Jamie said that we-that we're going to see the ball thing in New York!" Her eyes lit up and she brushed her palms across her face to push her multi layered hair out of her way. Jack had been there when she got in trouble for giving herself a haircut. Mrs. Bennett was definitely not pleased, but he thought Sophie still looked adorable either way.

"Where's Jamie now?" Jack asked, grinning at her as she scrambled to get out of his arms.

"Follow me, I'll show you." She said importantly, and grabbed at his hand before tugging him along to the backyard.

He saw Jamie, but he also saw two adults that he had never met. One was a petite woman, who was wearing a very colorful green dress that feathered out past her knees. Her hair was blond and soft looking with one strip dyed blue. She looked very beautiful, but the man next to her was the polar opposite. He was standing over Jamie, who looked rather nervous beside him, but Jack would be nervous too. The man was tall and pale, with a black blazer on and slick black pants. He appeared to be cloaked in shadows. His chin came to a point, giving his face a slightly malicious and powerful demeanor. He had his arms behind his back, eyes squinted as he was looked at what Jamie was busying himself with, and his eyebrows knitted together.

"Jamie," Sophie called out, and the teen glanced up and broke into a grin.

"Jack, hey, you're here!" He brushed his hands off and walked up to him. "I was starting to get a little awkward over there." He whispered and motioned subtlety to the man.

"Who is he?" Jack asked at the same volume, and looked him up and down.

"Uncle Pitch. He takes a little warming up to. Every time I see him I need a whole hour to feel comfortable." Jamie shrugged. "He's got a dark, whimsical side, especially when he's had a bit to drink."

Jack laughed at that, and "Uncle Pitch" slid his gaze over to him, before deciding to sit next to the woman.

"Who's she?"

"Aunt Tooth. My mom's sister. She's really great, but can get a little... in your space sometimes." Jamie laughed lightly, maybe at some memory, and Jack smiled at him before looking back at them.

"Wait, are they... married?" He blanched and gave Jamie a look.

"Yeah. My mom says that they 'complete' each other because they're such opposites. It's kind of weird, but my Aunt's happy, so whatever." He shrugged. "It's actually kind of cute, when Pitch doesn't have that..." He looked around for the right word and swirled his hand around, "well, that _look_."

Jamie recreated it, with his eyes squinted and scrutinizing. It looked odd on his face, and Jack laughed.

"Yeah, okay."

"Jamie, _please_, would you get the table set up?" Mrs. Bennett said, exasperated, whilst said teenager gave a guilty look before slinking inside to satisfy his mother. "Hello Jack, it's nice to see you. Have you met my sister yet?"

He shook his head.

"Well, I'll introduce you." She led him by the shoulder over to Tooth, who was chatting with Pitch, with Sophie seated on her lap.

"'Thiana, this is Jamie's friend, Jack."

Tooth looked up, her eyes a bright shade of purple which startled Jack, and smiled.

"Hi Jack, I'm Toothiana. I prefer Tooth though." She gave her sister a sideways glance, but stuck her hand out to shake. Jack took it hesitantly, and she tugged him closer to hug him, with Sophie giggling and squished between them. "It's so nice to meet you!"

Jack pulled back with a shy smile, and she gasped.

"Oh my goodness, Pitch, do you see his teeth? They sparkle like freshly fallen snow!" She smiled brightly and bounced up, handing Sophie over to her husband, who looked surprised. Before he knew it, her hand was on his jaw, firm but light at the same time, and his eyes widened.

"'Thiana, stop, you're scaring him."

"Angie, he's fine. You don't mind, do you sweetie?"

Oh great, another woman who called him sweetie.

He tried to respond, but her fingers made it difficult. Thankfully, Mrs. Bennett pulled her sister back with a look, and a pursed lip.

"Sorry," she said bashfully, "I just got a little excited."

"So I'm guessing you're a dentist?" Jack asked and rubbed his jaw. It didn't hurt, but he did it on impulse.

"Oh, no, I'm not." She laughed lightly. "I'm a language teacher. But I adore teeth, and not just because of my name."

Mrs. Bennett nodded her head.

"Ever since we were kids. I have no idea _why _she never became a dentist."

"You know I don't like causing people pain." She said and looked at Pitch, who was observing them silently, and Jack almost forgot that he was there. Sophie was sitting quietly on his lap, and didn't look the slight bit frightened. She sure was something.

"This is my husband, Pitch." She smiled at him.

"Hello," he said in a British accent, something Jack didn't expect, but it sounded natural and fitting.

"Hi," Jack said awkwardly, and Jamie came to his rescue.

"Mom, inside's ready. It's almost seven; people should be getting here soon."

"Oh, yes, good, thank you." She smoothed out her dress and left to go over look everything.

Tooth stood up gracefully, her flowing dress making her look slightly angelic and she reached her arms out to pick up Sophie, who accepted them, and they walked inside, with Pitch trailing after them silently. Jack shivered.

"Okay, I lied when I said Bennett parties are the best. I just wanted you to come and make it seem not so lame."

"I forgive you for betraying my trust and faith in you."

Jamie rolled his eyes.

"C'mon, it's getting cold." Jamie pinched Jack's sleeve and led him into the house and closed the door.

They walked into the living room, which had been rearranged slightly to open up the floor, and Pitch was talking to Tooth in the corner; with Sophie pulling on his leg to get his attention.

Someone knocked on the door, and Mrs. Bennett yelled at Jamie to 'answer it for the love of god.'

"She gets antsy when we have people over." He murmured before doing what she asked and greeting the person with a smile.

Over the next few hours, ten guests arrived, each bringing various foods and drinks, and Jamie was right; Pitch sure did warm up after he had a bit to drink. Jack found out that he could sort of dance. Tooth though, became as giggly and sunshiny as Sophie with too much sugar, and eventually Mrs. Bennett relaxed and joined everyone in their laughs. Jack and Jamie thought everything was quite hilarious, especially when midnight came around, and the adults chanted loudly with the people in New York (recorded live a few hours before), and the ball dropped. Tooth gave Pitch a big smooch, and Jamie led Jack around the corner to give him a kiss as well.

Needless to say, it was a blast.

Sophie popped one of the confetti poppers, and fireworks blasted out into the sky outside. The two teenagers made their way to the backyard to watch. They sat next to each other on the picnic bench, and Jamie slid his hand over to hold Jack's. The white haired teen looked over at him, and he smiled.

"Happy New Years, Jack." He said lightly. Jack felt something tug at his heart.

"Happy New Years, Jamie."


	15. Chapter 15

**Not much to say. I guess maybe check out The First Time He Killed Himself- RotG oneshot, tells what happened to Emma.**

**Oh! I remember! READ THIS PLEASE:: Jack's sister's name is NOT Pippa. Okay? It is unknown. Pippa is Jamie's friend with the hat. The girl. Pippa and Jack's sister have the same voice actor though. Same with Jack's mom and Jamie's mom. Soooo, in turn, me, and other authors, can choose whatever name we want for Jack's sister, and it is technically not wrong. Okay, sorry about the little rant.**

**Shout out to:**

**ChellyErinClark**

**vampire kitty 13**

**SkyHighFan**

**likhitata (Aw, I think it's kind of a cute pairing.)**

**Tenshi Yami- Angel of Darkness**

**KaiFudo16**

**Keyblades of Oblivion**

**Clio Ying**

**The Black Spirit**

**WhiteAnxiety(Sandy is the sign language teacher mentioned in my oneshot The First Time He Killed Himself. He probably won't actually be in this story though, sorry :/ But I love him too)**

**soundsoulryan**

**UmbrellaEl**

**Link's Rose**

**Odisdera-kun**

**KataleyaPavlenka (Oh my god. Your review just struck me right in the heart. Thank you so much. Gah. I love you.)**

**SuperFreakeh (Ah, I don't know what to say but thank you so much, oh my god, gah, I'm at a loss for words. Thank you.)**

**LoveSparkle**

**BexiLynn**

**imadj**

**SailorDeathMoon**

**Roanam**

**angiedicuss**

**I lot of new reviewers. Thank you everyone!**

* * *

Jack knew that this year, 2013, would be something amazing; full of hope and rebirth. He'd become a new person. He was already starting to become a new person. He could feel it in his chest and in the restfulness of his mind that, for once, he would be able to maybe finally feel at peace with his place on the Earth and the person he was becoming. New Years was something of a revelation for him.

It was a week into the brand new year, and school had started up again. Jack found himself, almost subconsciously, actually going to his non art classes. Since he had cut back on his smoking, the need to hide out in the woods wasn't necessary. He went to History, and Algebra, and all those other terribly boring classes. Though being terribly lost, and just barely passing all of them with Ds, he felt himself slightly wanting to do better. But there was the nagging depression at the back of his mind that made him skip a few classes each week; and never do any of his homework. When he lay in bed at night, every so often he felt the panic and stress seep into his thoughts, and he promised himself he'd do better. The next morning though, he'd feel dragged down and lagging, wanting nothing more than to draw and paint and spend time with Jamie; who was unbelievably getting a 3.8 GPA. Jack promised him that he was doing fine and that he didn't need any help, but his pitiful 2.7 was screaming at him to get himself on track, and graduate with a GPA worthy of college.

Don't get him wrong, Jack had dreams and hopes and a great wonder for the future. But he also had fears and depression that kept him from "being the best he could be". His memories from his past, something terrible and dark and dismal, pulled him back like a heavy lead ball and chain. So many what ifs. He knew that if what happened hadn't happened, he would never have met Jamie. But would he go so far as to say that his little sister's death was just fated to happen? Fated so that he could meet Jamie? Jack knew that he couldn't change what happened, and that he shouldn't feel guilt over meeting Jamie, but something took root in his brain. The question: If he could go back and save Emma and never meet Jamie, would he?

Jack knew it wasn't a question he should ask himself. For one, he couldn't go back and redo what happened. For two, it wasn't fair to Emma, Jamie, or himself. And for three, Jack knew he'd hate himself for whatever answer he reasoned to himself was the best.

Jack sat at his desk, thinking these things, with his head rested on his arms that were crossed on the wood and stared at the staff on the wall. It was something simple yet beautiful to him. It was worn and had cracks spiraling around it, but he loved it and kept it after they moved from the countryside. It was his sister's, after all. He kept a few things that belonged to her, to keep the memories alive and beating. The staff, the white plate with little yellow flowers, and the stuffed rabbit. He couldn't let go. And he hoped that Emma didn't want him to let go either.

His phone buzzed, startling him, and he sat up and flipped it open.

_im sick, not going to school 2morrow, u cant make me_

Jack smiled and laughed a little.

_Yeah, okay. I hope you feel better. I'll miss you._

_u better_

Jack laughed and got up to lie on his bed and propped himself on his elbows.

_Of course._

A minute ticked by.

_ill miss you 2. night_

_Night._

Jack set his phone on his nightstand, and it clicked against a little shard of glass. Call him sentimental, he liked to keep things from his past; the good and the harmful.

The next morning he got himself ready, careful to remember his contacts, and went to school for the never ending cycle that he had grown to loathe. It was an A day, so he had his favorite class, which was only dampened a little from the lack of Jamie. He loved painting. Company or not.

As the period drew to an end, he cleaned up his table leisurely. He washed his hand slowly, which were completely covered in paint, since he liked to blend colors that he didn't need much of on his skin. The bell rang just as he had put his paint brushes into his bag, but before he picked up his stuff, Mr. Reyes called him over.

"Jack, could you come over here for a minute?"

Jack's heart quickened despite knowing himself that he did nothing wrong.

"Yeah, okay," he stammered and bit his lip before slinking over.

"Have a seat." He said with an unusual sense of seriousness.

Jack slowly lowered himself on the chair that sat right next to his desk. His palms beginning to sweat.

"Is there a problem?" He asked slowly.

"No, yes, depending on how you look at it." Mr. Reyes folded his fingers together. "Some of the staff and I were talking, and you came up."

"U-um, okay..."

"Jack, you've been skipping classes. When I told them that you were a bright and talented student, it was like we were talking about two different kids." He leaned forward. "Jack, I _know _you're smart and I _know _that you know better than to skip classes and blow off your work."

Jack averted his gaze and gnawed on his bottom lip.

"Okay, do you want to know something?"

Jack shrugged and shyly nodded his head.

"When I was a kid, stupid and foolish, I skipped school almost every day. I didn't care about my education, or anything. I was failing everything; I barely made it through my freshmen year. I had a tough life, okay? I didn't see the point in going through all the trouble of getting good grades, because I was going to achieve nothing, and then die. My friends were no help to me, and my dad didn't push hard work and perseverance. But then I moved in with my mom. And things changed. Not just because she made me go to school, but because I found things I loved by going. Art, sports, and yes, I realized that I wasn't stupid. I've seen a lot in my years, I've lost a lot, but those things aren't really important enough to say. We all go through stuff. I can tell you're going through things. But you're so talented and so passionate about your art. I _know_ that most of all, if you find your center and stick to it, you'll be great. Jack, you need to make it through these next few years, get back on the horse, and pull through high school. I believe in you."

Mr. Reyes put his hand on his shoulder, and Jack looked up slowly and met his teacher's brown eyes.

_I believe in you._

Jack's eyes watered and he rubbed them to get rid of the moisture.

"Thank you." He whispered. Mr. Reyes squeezed his shoulder and got up.

"I'll write you a note."

Jack got up and slung his strap over his shoulder. He drew in a breath before accepting the late note and thanking him again. My. Reyes didn't say anything else, just waved him out with a nod, and Jack knew that he wanted him to make the decision to be a better student himself.

He had never really appreciated teachers before. Teachers were the people that taught them things that they really didn't need to know. They were adults that watched over them while their parents were out making money to survive on. Usually, they didn't go out of their way to help, or at least the teachers that Jack had met. His Freshmen year, they went easy on him after his sister had died and he had spent time in the hospital, but they didn't help him through his depression. They just pardoned his half completed work. Sophomore year, they were less generous, since it was expected of him to get over what happened and move on. Sophomore year was bad. Now, on his Junior year, after many teachers and four schools, he had finally met a teacher that really wanted something more for him. It was... truly amazing.

He owed it to Emma, his parents, Mr. Reyes, and himself to be better. And he vowed, no matter how he felt or how much he didn't want to, that he'd go to his classes, work hard, and graduate a changed man.

A few days later, on Saturday, he was sitting on Jamie's couch, leaning up against his side with his arm over his shoulder. Sophie and his mother were asleep. Jack had a new spark in his chest, and it burned warmly. His smile hadn't left his face.

"Hey Jack, do you think... well, I don't know, only if _you_ want to, but-" Jamie huffed and paused for a second. "Do you think it's a good idea if we tell our parents about... us?"

Jack froze for a second and thought.

"Uh... Are you ready to come out to your mom?"

"Oh, she already kind of knows I like you." Jamie said slowly and quietly.

"What?" Jack sat up and looked at Jamie. "You're telling me that your mom knows you're gay, and that she knows you like me, and that she doesn't know we're together? And you didn't tell me these things because...?"

"I don't know." Jamie sighed. "Everything's been so... hectic and amazing and unbelievable. And, you know, the end of the semester's almost up, I've got lots of tests and homework. I've just been... preoccupied? But I was thinking about it last night. She asked how we were doing, and if I told you and I panicked and said no." He bit his lip with worry. "But... Should we tell her? And your parents? You said that they 'love you no matter what'."

Jack looked around the room and at his hands for a few seconds before inhaling deeply through his nose to calm his nerves. "I... I guess we should. But you know what that means, right?"

"No... what?"

"No more sleepovers."

"Oh." Jamie contemplated that for a second. It's not like they really did anything _bad_, but he would definitely miss their late night talks and, yes, making out on his bed.

"Change your mind?"

"No," Jamie finally decided on. "just because we can't let other people know doesn't mean our family can't know. Right?"

Jack shrugged.

"Are you okay with it?" Jamie asked with worry lacing his voice. He began to wring his hands. Jack smiled and put his own hands over Jamie's.

"Yes, I'm okay with it. I'm sure everything will be alright. No need hiding something we're not ashamed of, right?"

The brown haired boy smiled in relief.

"Yeah, okay."

Jack kissed him soundly and ran his fingers through his hair. Jamie hummed contentedly.

"Then how about we enjoy the last night we have together?" Jack asked with a smirk.

"Sounds like a plan to me."


	16. Chapter 16

**Hey guys, so sorry. Long time no update. Whoops. I just had terrible writers block, my computer was like, nope, you can re-write this, and then my life was like, Writing? Ain't nobody got time fo dat! Soo, yeah. Here's the next chapter.**

**Shout Out To:**

**ChellyErinClark**

**KaiFudo16**

**vampire kitty 13**

**someonefromearth (Mr. Reyes is actually based off of my own art teacher, who's an amazing man and I just felt like he'd be very good for Jack. But that's an interesting comment... Hmm, I might have to put MiM in there :) )**

**XLastForever**

**Tenshi Yami- Angel of Darkness**

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**Wondrous Mind(guest)**

**Okay you guys, your usernames are too long... But I love them.**

* * *

After a long night of talking, snuggling, and staying up until four in the morning; they decided that they'd tell their parents together, all at the same time, in three days. They figured that doing it right after they had spent the night together would be suspicious, and that having everyone one altogether would be easier. Jamie was nervous, not because of his mom (and sister, of course), but because of Jack's parents. He knew they really liked him, but as their son's boyfriend? Hmm, he wasn't so sure on that.

Jack assured him that it would be okay. He had already told his parents that yes, he does in fact like boys too, and even though they sort of shrugged it off, they definitely weren't homophobic. But Jamie knew that if they had the choice, they wouldn't want their son to be with another guy. They'd want him to fall in love with a nice girl, get married and have their own kids. Not that it couldn't happen with another man, but things would be more difficult.

Jamie berated himself, telling his nerves that Jack wasn't just going to get up and leave; but his heart felt heavy and his stomach was squirming.

"The faster we get it over with, the better you'll feel." Jack comforted, but Jamie just nodded half convinced with pursed lips; and his arms wrapped around his torso. He just got so nervous. Maybe he had anxiety problems?

So when the third day had come up and shined its bright and glaring face at him, Jamie steeled himself up and got ready for the day. It was a school day, but the two families were having dinner together at Jack's house. It took a bit of convincing on both parts, and even though Mrs. Bennett and Mrs. Frost got along quite nicely; they wanted to postpone till it was a more convenient time for them. But Jack was persistent, even though it was Jamie's idea in the first place. So here they were, facing each other after school, saying that they'd see each other at six to give the good news. Or, hopefully good news.

Jamie readied himself at five thirty, putting on a nice blue-green T-shirt and a gray sweater with dark jeans. Casual enough to be comfortable yet dressed up enough to look nice. He just hoped Jack was wearing something similar, so he wouldn't feel so standoutish.

His mother wore a nice pink shirt and a floral print skirt. Sophie insisted on putting on last year's Easter dress that was slightly too small. She wouldn't have it any other way, so Mrs. Bennett gave in to insure that they wouldn't be late.

Jamie drove them over, his palms sweaty and heart hammering, but he knew this was right. No secrets. This was his and his boyfriend's families. No big deal.

Before getting out, he sucked in a breath and took his time unbuckling.

"Sweetie, what's up with you?" His mom asked as she put her hand on his shoulder.

He knew that she suspected something. Hell, she probably knew why he had asked her to come. But it didn't help the sick pit in his stomach. Ever since he was a kid he had been nervous about confessions. His body was so stupid.

"I'm fine. Let's just go in, okay?" He opened up his door and locked the car after his mom and sister had exited. They walked up the steps and Jamie knocked on the door for the first time in quite a while. This was slightly formal. He had to be polite.

It wasn't Jack or his mom that opened the door, it was Mark; and all of a sudden he got why guys had talked about being nervous to collect their dates with the fathers around.

But Mark wasn't frowning or crossing his arms. He smiled and opened the door wide to let them all in with a friendly greeting. If only he knew.

"Hello, Angeline," Mrs. Frost came up and did the weird mom hand shake where they pretty much just hold each other's hands for a few seconds. Jamie nudged over until he found Jack, but Sophie beat him to it.

"Hey, this one yours?" Jack joked and picked up Sophie and hauled her up on his back.

Jamie smiled at them and bit his lip.

"Can I talk to you for a second?"

Jack set Sophie back down and asked her if she would go help his mom set up the table. She was more than willing, and Jack gestured down the hall to his bedroom. Jamie led the way, gnawing at his lip, and plopped himself on the other's bed.

"So, how are we, uh, going about this?" Jamie started and watched Jack sit down next to him.

"I, well I... I figured that after dinner we could just say, 'We know you guys are wondering why we have gathered you today, and we've just got to tell you that we are in a relationship.'" Jack shrugged then added, "'and happy.'"

"Really? That's terrible."

"Terrible? How dare you."

"It sounds stiff and... I don't know. Poorly executed."

"Fine. Then you tell them." Jack pointed his finger at him with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm good." Jamie quirked his lip and Jack huffed.

"Then we'll do it my way."

Jamie sighed deeply and stood up.

"We better get out there."

"Yeah. I guess you're right." Jack stood up along with him and pressed a chaste kiss on his lips. "This'll all be fine. Don't worry."

"I hope you're right."

Jack shrugged as if to say 'No biggy' and walked out of his room with Jamie trailing behind.

Their moms and Sophie were sitting in the living room, while Mark was in the kitchen, oddly enough; putting the last touches on their dinner. Steak and potatoes with broccoli. Simple but good. That's all Jamie wanted out of this day: simple but good.

Within a few minutes, they were all sitting at the table, chatting and laughing and making conversation. Sophie was enjoying this little night the most, and Anna had brought out a bottle of wine. It was highly unnecessary to Jamie, but maybe it was just because of his extreme disapproval of alcohol. He kept his contempt hidden easily though, with his mind readily slipping back into the impending confession they would make as the minutes ticked by. Before he could start imagining all the worst, he was distracted by a question Anna asked.

"Have you given any thought to where you want to go for college?"

Jamie shrugged. "I don't really know. I haven't given much thought to it." He noticed his mother give him a look and he sighed. "I know I really should, but I at least know I want to get an English major. But I really love mythology." He shrugged again. "I've just got to do some research, but I'm thinking about going to college in a city."

"Well, at least you've got something in mind." Anna smiled and then looked at Jack. "Our Jackie doesn't really know what he's doing."

That's a lie; Jamie thought but kept his mouth shut.

Jack took this moment to interrupt, "That's the future, and right now is the present." Jack gave Jamie a sideways glance and he gave him a shaky nod. This was it.

"So," Jack stood up and put his hands flush on the table, "I, uh, guess you all are wondering why you're here."

The three adults looked at each other and Sophie looked at Jamie, who diverted his eyes.

"Sweetie," Anna started and looked at her husband. "We know."

"Y-you... know?"

"Son, you couldn't make in any more obvious." Mark commented and put his arm around his wife, who had a half smile quirked on her lips.

"Jamie, you know we love you." Anna said and then turned her head to smile at Angeline. "If you're, you know, with our son, well..." She faltered and then finished with a sigh.

"We can learn to accept it." Mark nodded and reached out his hand to shake it with Jamie. The teenager looked at it for a moment and hesitantly shook it. What was this, a business deal?

"Well, are we done here?" Anna asked quickly, and stood up before clearing the table. Jack looked at his parents with his mouth shut and his eyes wide.

Mrs. Bennett stood up as well and took Sophie's hand.

"Uh, do you mind if I just drive Jamie home later?" Jack asked. "I think we should... talk."

Mrs. Bennett opened her mouth, but Anna interrupted.

"Sweetie, Jamie should be going home. It's a school night."

Jamie, Jack, and Mrs. Bennett stared at her for a few seconds, each of them with their own emotions flickering in them. Jamie feeling ashamed, Jack feeling embarrassed, and Mrs. Bennett uneasy.

"C'mon Jamie," Angeline reached out her hand to tug her son next to her. "Thank you for having us over." She said flatly and they left.

Jack stared at the door for a few seconds before spinning around to confront his parents.

"What's wrong with you guys?"

"Wrong with us? We didn't do anything wrong." Anna defended and set the plates back on the table.

"Oh, get off it. You made them feel uncomfortable. You made me feel uncomfortable. Do you have a problem with it?"

"We love Jamie-"

"Yeah, okay, you love Jamie being my friend. But I really like Jamie, okay? I thought you'd be more accepting." Jack stopped abruptly to suck in a breath and run his fingers through his hair. "Do you know how worried Jamie was about coming out to you guys? He was terrified. And you guys just made it worse."

"Your father and I have already talked about this, Jack. We knew about Jamie, and we're working it out. You don't have to be so selfish."

"Selfish? Selfish?" Jack slammed his hands on the table and looked his mom straight in the eyes. "I'm trying to help myself get better. Isn't that what you wanted? Isn't that why we moved here? If finally feeling seen and liking it means I'm selfish, then so be it!"

"Don't yell at your mother." Mark said and stood up as well. "Do you know how much we've done for you? Do you know how much this family's suffered?"

"Don't you get it? Liking Jamie, being with Jamie, it's not hurting this family. Why should it matter?" Jack's voice drifted off to a slight whisper and he bit his lip.

"Because liking a boy could get you hurt, Jack!"

Jack looked at his mother before sliding down to sit at the table. His heart was pounding, and he could feel the stress of the situation come over him after his outburst was done.

"I-I won't-"

"Jack, you have to listen to me," Anna sat down next to him and grabbed his hand to cover with her own. "Your father and I have already lost one child." She began to tear up. "Your life would be so much easier if you just stuck to liking girls. We know you're not gay."

"Mom, I can't help who I like. It just happens." Jack could feel a headache coming on. Explaining sexuality to his parents was something he hated to do. He'd already tried to do it once, and now he just realized that they nodded and smiled because they just wanted to get it over with.

Jack knew his parents loved him. Jack loved them with all his heart. They had been there for each other for years. But this... it just threw a terrible wrench in their relationship. It wouldn't ruin them, he knew it. But considering it was this specific time of year, and how he already had problems with his addiction, this would be a difficult experience to power through.

"Sweetie, I want you to promise me that you won't tell anyone about this... this thing you have with him."

Jack brought his hand back to his lap and stood up.

"Mom, I can make my own decisions." He swallowed hard and left to go into his room.

After he closed the door and locked it, he pressed his back to the door and closed his eyes to try and calm himself down. He could feel his anger boiling up, but he had trained himself in ways to calm it down with thoughts and breathing and other stress relievers. He didn't like taking the anger out on himself. He never cut angry. That could result in a hospital visit, and therefore his parents knowing. Even though he was upset with them, it didn't mean that he wanted them to worry about his problem.

Before he took out his phone to see if Jamie called or texted, he tugged off his sweater and the shirt underneath. He just stood there for a few seconds, feeling the cool air tickle his skin, before getting his things out of his desk and calming himself the best way he knew. Painting just wouldn't do it tonight.

At Jamie's house, he was curled up on the couch, leaning against his mom; sandwiched between her and Sophie who was nodding off with her head on his side. Mrs. Bennett was stroking her son's hair and hugging him close to her. He had been this way ever since they got home, fighting off tears and gnawing on his lip.

"I love you, Jamie. No matter what. Always."

He nodded lightly.

"Love you..." Sophie mumbled, trying to fight off her sleepiness.

"Love you too, Soph." Jamie said, trying to put as much feeling in it as he could in his current mental state.

"Okay, little girl, it's time to go to bed." Mrs. Bennett stood up slowly to not disturb Jamie too much and picked Sophie up to take her to bed. Within ten minutes, she was back and letting Jamie lean up against her again. He was already taller than her, and it just reminded her that he was no longer a little boy. They rarely had moments like these. He was obviously really upset, but she was glad that they had a relationship that was strong enough for him to open up to her.

"Jamie," Mrs. Bennett said quietly, not yet a whisper but not at her regular volume.

"Hmm?"

"I want nothing more than for you to be happy." She kissed the side of his head and squeezed him. "And you know what? I'm glad you guys came clean. Just because they don't approve or whatever, doesn't mean it's what dictates your decisions. And even if Jack's parents aren't happy about it, well, you guys can just spend time here." She kissed him again and smiled.

"Thanks, mom," Jamie nuzzled up to her and hugged her tightly. "I love you."

"I love you too." She hummed lightly. "And in a few years, you can move to California or New York, or somewhere accepting and be yourself with whomever you love."

Jamie didn't say anything to that, but smiled to himself and felt better about what had happened that day.


	17. Chapter 17

So sorry guys, it's been a long time. Terrible writers block. But hey, my life's changed a bit. Got a job, yay. Getting busy. Playing rugby games on the weekend.

Rise of the Guardians is out on DVD! Yeah!

So, wow, a lot of you guys were really upset with Jack's parents. Hehe, yeah. Anyway, I hope you like this. Tried to make it a little long, but it's only a bit over 2,000 words.

Shout Out To:

XLastForever

Link's Rose

Kaytil

Kalistrazan

Roanam

A Hole in the World

someonefromearth

Keyblades of Oblivion

Tenshi Yami-Angel of Darkness

farfetched4

Fumus000

anonona

youdon"tknowme06

KaiFudo16

Radioactive hearts

BexiLynn

likhitata

vampire kitty 13

Mallory Mirkov

Rahar Moonfire

Clio Ying

Yami's Devil

Odisdera-kun

Black-Ookami-san

Qwert124

UmbrellaEl

AoiGirl

Black Wilted Lotus

Bell Nix (Wow! Your review kicked me in the butt to get this done. Thank you for that, haha. Jeez, it made me smile :) )

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Jack lay on his back, just staring at the ceiling with his limbs splayed out and his heart thrumming. He figured he should text Jamie, to see how he was doing after what had happened the night before. The next day at school, Jamie had been absent, and Jack hadn't gotten the chance to contact him; since it was finals weeks and Jack was actually trying extremely hard to get his failing classes up to a C. But he was home now, feeling tired and heavy, contemplating whether or not to slip his phone out of his jeans and send a message.

Jack let out a gust of air and decided to do it, even though he wanted nothing more than to take a nap. Jamie seemed really distraught. Hopefully his mom was taking it okay.

_Hey, what's up?_

A few minutes went by before he got any response.

_im a bit busy. ttyl kay?_

_Okay then._

Jack quirked his lip before sitting up and staring at his phone. He knew he shouldn't feel disappointed, Jamie could be busy if he wanted to, but he hadn't talked to him for a while and they left on an awkward note. He was trying to spend as much time busying himself in his room to avoid his parents, who were doing the whole silent guilt thing. He tried not to think too harshly of them, because they didn't understand, and he couldn't really make them understand.

Anyway, it was that time of the year. At around this time they were all very emotional and sensitive, prone to closing up and snapping at each other. It should've been a time where they used each other as a crutch, but they all blamed themselves for what happened, and they couldn't deal with it. It had been years, but it still felt like a fresh wound.

Jack got up and paced around his room, before going over to his window, and pulling up the shades. It was six in the evening, and the night had already crept into the sky, washing over everything in shadows. Even this didn't perk up Jack's interest, and night was his favorite time of the day. With a sigh, he pressed his forehead to the chilly window and blew on it to create some fog on the glass. With a little smile, he drew a bunny on it and then put the shades back over it.

"God, I'm bored out of my mind." He mumbled to no one and perched on the side of his bed. Then he realized that he didn't have to spend Friday night locked up in his room.

It wouldn't be the first time he snuck out. It was no big deal. His parents and he weren't really talking, so he didn't have to worry about them coming in to check up on him. All he needed to do was climb out the window, keep quiet until he was off of their yard, and be on his merry way.

He took a few seconds to make sure his door was locked, before slipping on some shoes and pushing up the window. It resisted slightly, but he thanked the heavens that it didn't squeak. He used his nightstand to push himself on the sill, then swung his legs over, and plopped down on the grass. His room faced the backyard, so he didn't really bother pushing the window back down, since he didn't mind the cold air in his room.

After walking around to the front of the house, carefully avoiding the living room and kitchen, he shoved his hands into his pockets and started walking. He didn't have any special place in mind. The night was all he needed. The night had been all he needed for years.

Jack took deep breaths through his nose, trying to soak up all he could to energize himself, and he felt alive and awake. He started walking towards the park but still didn't feel the need to plan out a destination or path. Jack felt good just walking in the night air, under the stars, alone, and ultimately at peace.

His life had sort of been a mess for years. After Emma... left, he hadn't played baseball, attended all his classes, or even cared much about anything. In his personal struggle to obtain any sense of normality, he took up cutting and smoking and art. The first two weren't too bad, because hey, he could've become addicted to crack or pills, even pot; or killed himself. He was doing okay. Jack was doing okay, and Jack was going to do okay for a while.

"Okay, okay." He said out loud just for the hell of it and pulled out a pack of cigarettes, took one, and stuck it in his mouth. His lighter was harder to pull out, but eventually he brought it up, lit his cancer stick, and took a deep, searing breath; and held it in so long that it hurt. He exhaled and inhaled through his nose, and stopped walking for a few seconds to sit on a metal bench by the park sign. He relaxed his body and took another drag, not worrying too much about people that might walk by, not his parents or Jamie. His brain just shut off for a few seconds and let him rest.

He savored the last bit of his cigarette for the next few minutes, since he was trying to wean himself off, and would try to resist his nicotine addiction for a few more days. Life, God life was really changing. And life was really fucking beautiful. Jack sat under the world and felt opened up and enlightened by everything. He knew the feeling wouldn't last, and he'd wake up feeling plain and completely normal the next day, but in this very moment, he felt like his life force was weaving and flowing and beating with every other person and thing around him.

Jack sighed with contentment and lit another cigarette, forgetting about lung cancer and his promise to Jamie. Well, not completely. He said he would try to quit, and he was.

"_And with his claws, he outstretches his reach; everything is in his hand_." Jack said, jaw barely moving, and head leaned back against the bench. He took a deep inhale of smoke and exhaled just as quickly, going through the motions instead of absorbing it in. "I must be going crazy."

He laughed and snuffed out the half he didn't smoke with his thumb against the concrete. He winced a little but ignored it for a few seconds, when he looked up and saw that he was on the street adjacent to Jamie's. Good idea or not, he figured it wouldn't be too terribly bad if he dropped by for a few seconds. He didn't even have to knock on the door.

The white haired teenager hopped up on his feet and took the five or so minute trip to Jamie's house. He knew there was a loose board in the backyard's fence, and he squeezed through that with a few pebbles to fling at Jamie's upstairs window.

"Jamie," Jack whispered after he chucked a small one at the window. "Jamie!"

There was no response for a few stretched out seconds. Then, after a few more pebbles, Jamie pushed up the window and stuck his head out.

"Jack? What are you doing?" He pushed his hair back and leaned on the sill.

"What soft, from yonder window breaks? It is Juliet, and he is the sun!"

"I think that's wrong." Jamie said but smiled nonetheless.

"Close enough though, right? Balcony, its night, the stage is set." Jack gave him a quirky smile and took a few steps back to get a better look at him. "You feeling up for 'sneaking out'?"

"By sneaking out I hope you mean a completely mom approved walk around town."

"Oh, you're such a goody two shoes. Fine, that's what I meant. C'mon down, my Juliet."

Jamie rolled his eyes, but agreed to come down. A few minutes later, he was walking out the door with his favorite sea foam green hat.

"Home by 11:59." Jamie said as he adjusted his headgear.

"Yeah, yeah, okay." Jack smiled and leaned in for a kiss when Jamie lifted his face.

After they pulled away, Jamie asked, "Wow, excited to see me?"

"Mhmm." Jack mused and pressed his forehead against Jamie's.

"Not that I'm complaining." He shrugged and kissed his boyfriend. "Where to?"

"Wherever. Just away. Away into the night and to not think about the day."

"What's gotten into you?" Jamie chuckled lightly and squeezed Jack's hand before letting go as they passed under the loose fence board.

"Life? I'm just feeling good tonight." Jack sucked in a deep breath and he believed, truly, that the air had never tasted sweeter.

Jamie smiled but didn't say anything as they walked on the cracked street. Sometimes it was really depressing that they couldn't show affection in public, but it made their moments alone all the more special. And like his mom said; someday he'd move to someplace new and accepting, and he could be himself without having to worry about how people would act. Burgess was the place his house was, but it wasn't his home, and he sure as hell knew that it wasn't Jack's home either.

At that thought, Jamie couldn't help but think about the future. It was something so big and so blinding and so scary. And it also was coming up too soon. He felt like he was on the verge of knowing what he wanted, but it was just out of reach enough to cause him the terribly anxiety ridden stomach pains when he thought too much about it.

"Isn't the moon the most beautiful thing you've ever seen?" Jack interrupted his thoughts and Jamie glanced up at it, full and completely un-obscured by clouds.

"Yeah. Yeah, I guess it is." The brown haired teenager shrugged. Jack sighed because Jamie just didn't understand, but let it go.

"You're pretty beautiful, too." Jack offered and the younger teen scoffed.

"I wouldn't describe me as beautiful. Guys aren't beautiful."

"There are different types of beautiful."

Jamie rolled his eyes, but thanked him for the compliment anyway.

"So," Jamie coughed and transitioned the conversation, "Soph's birthday's in a few days, and we're going out to pick a puppy out for her. She's been begging for one for a few years now. Do you think you'd want to come with us?"

"Oh, yeah, sure." Jack smiled at the thought of Sophie's face when she saw her present.

"My mom was thinking about a little dog, but I can't stand the thought of a yapping rat prancing around the house. I'm sure Sophie'll thank me later."

"What kind of dog are you thinking about?"

"A greyhound." Jamie grinned.

"Greyhound?"

"Yeah, I mean, how cool would a greyhound be? Sophie could play with him and not worry about smothering it, because you know how excited she gets, and when she gets older she won't have to worry about stepping on it or anything." Jamie started to talk with his hands, getting more and more excited about the prospect of a big dog in the house.

"Are you sure _you_ don't just really want one?"

"Well, I'm actually quite positive I do want one, but I think Sophie will love it too. A dog is a dog, as long as it's not a little one."

They spent the rest of their time just walking in circles around town, talking and laughing, and avoiding the subject of their parents. Jamie was worried about what Jack's parents thought, so he didn't want to find out sooner than needed. His boyfriend seemed happy enough, so he figured it wasn't too bad until 11:59 came rolling in, and Jack's mood declined steadily.

"Is everything okay?" Jamie asked and stopped walking. Jack continued on until the brown haired teen pulled on his hoodie sleeve, and brought him back to him.

"Everything's okay."

"Okay really isn't as okay as the word suggests." Jamie dropped his hand back to his side.

"Things are a little weird. But it'll be okay."

"You sure?"

"I'm positive." Jack said, but it didn't sound as sincere as Jamie would want it to be.

"Yeah... Okay." Jamie shrugged slightly and then continued to walk to his house. "Okay."

When they got back, this time at the front door, Jack looked around to make sure no one was around, before kissing him goodbye, then leaving without too many words. Jamie gnawed at his lip a bit before going up to his room and stripping down to his boxers. He slid under the covers, feeling the webs of sleep pushing his eyelids down, and curled up on his side, trying not to think about the bad outcomes that could happen.


	18. Chapter 18

**Wow guys. I'm so sorry. It's been forever. Like, really, forever. I'm not going to give any excuses. Just, I hope you enjoy this chapter. I can't even wait for this to be beta'd. I gotta get it out now.**

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Jack woke up two days later to a text from Jamie, excitedly announcing that it was the day to pick out a dog(or more so, a greyhound) for Sophie. He smiled at the enthusiasm and quickly got ready to tag along with Jamie and his mom. They would be picking him up in thirty minutes, and he didn't want his parents seeing Jamie outside the house, so he decided to just wait on his street corner. They were still acting funny, and his mom had that great mom way of making him feel guilty about things he shouldn't be feeling guilty about. Moms had the worst superpowers.

Jack adjusted his hoodie sleeves just as they pulled up. With a greeting to Angeline and a quick hello peck to Jamie, he slide into the backseat and they were off to the local dog adoption shelter. Jamie really had his heart set on a greyhound, and he swore that they would scour the Earth until they found the perfect one, claiming he wouldn't settle for anything less for Sophie. His mother laughed and rolled her eyes, but figured that Jamie probably had a good reason to get that specific kind of dog.

Though Jack had been through his share of depressing moments over the past few days, Jamie's smile and the whole process of getting Sophie's present really brightened up his mood. He couldn't feel the tugs of negativity when Jamie was just so darn happy, and more than once that day he found himself laughing like he used to; carefree and light.

By the end of the day, all the shelters they had visited mostly inhabited mutts, and even though they all agreed that there was nothing wrong with an adorable scruffy dog, Jamie's present needs would not be satisfied. It wasn't until they had gotten home that the brown haired teen had gotten the idea to look on the internet to see if anyone was selling the kind of breed they needed in their area. By miraculous act of the gods and luck, a litter of greyhound puppies, three months old, were for sale.

"Jack, this is fate. This is Jesus telling me to get this dog. Jesus wants me to get this dog." Jamie insisted as he sat in front of the laptop.

Jack chuckled a little before saying, "Well, I don't know if it's Jesus, but you're lucky they still have a few left. But it's a bit... costy."

"Doesn't matter. I've been saving up for a puppy for years."

"I feel like this is just a gift for yourself."

"I've got all the best intentions though." Jamie looked up at Jack and smiled a crooked grin before fishing out his phone to call the number on the ad.

The couple who was selling the dogs had two left, a boy and a girl, and said that they could come over tomorrow to look at them. Jamie hung up the phone with a big smile on his face and then went to inform his mom that he had completed the quest.

She was pleased to find out that she wouldn't have to pay the whole cost and Jack offered in some cash(which Jamie tried to refuse but he was adamant) as well. If all went according to plan, the Bennett household would have a new dog in a few days. Jamie wanted that day to come immediately, since he was the kind of person who had a short patience for changes in life. Jack just stood in the background with his arms crossed and a smile on his face as his boyfriend got in a big tizzy while still trying to hide all the excitement from Sophie, who had gotten back from their grandparent's house after a day of running around the backyard and eating her grandpa's special chocolate pie.

"Hey, Jamie, do you mind if we..." Jack gestured to the stairs, up where the brown haired teen's bedroom was.

"Oh, uh, yeah. Okay." He stood up from the kitchen table and set the glass he was drinking from at the sink before tailing behind Jack up to his room. He clicked the door shut and then turned around to see Jack sitting at his desk table with his fingers massaging his temples.

"Are you doing okay?" Jamie asked and sunk down onto his bed and tucked up his legs.

"I don't know." Jack said, not hiding behind the meaningless word "okay" and trying to be honest. As honest as he could figure out. "I don't know if this will blow over, I don't know if they'll get over it, I don't know if they'll keep stressing me out. I guess I'm doing fine. I just... I can't stand feeling like I'm doing something wrong."

"Do you think this is wrong?" Jamie asked quietly. His gut got that sinking feeling.

"No, god no. This _isn't_ wrong. Not at all."

"Then why are you feeling like that?"

"Because they're acting like I'm committing a crime. Like loving you is something I should be ashamed of doing."

Jamie stared at Jack for a few seconds, feeling his heart practically skip a beat then start to pick up. Did he hear his right? Did Jack just say that he loved him? Jack told him he loved him that one day when they first kissed, but there was a big difference between him saying that them and then now.

Now it was something more. Then it was the kind of love that you love a close friend. Something important and true, but not like it could be now. Unless Jamie was overthinking it. It could still be that kind of feeling. Not the kind that made his heart race and his hands sweat and blossomed emotions that he couldn't name in his gut.

Though on the inside his thoughts were racing, Jamie didn't say anything about Jack's word choice, and tried to continue on what he was saying because the important matter at hand was that Jack was having problem's with his parents.

"Y-you know, you don't have to listen to what they're saying. Parents should support no matter what. I mean, support when it's nothing bad or anything. And this isn't bad. In fact, it's great." Jamie smiled at Jack, who managed a half smile as he raised his head from his hand.

"I shouldn't be complaining, really. Some kids get beaten up and kicked out."

"You shouldn't belittle your problems. Each person's struggle is their own personal metaphorical mountain. If it bothers you, then it's important and you shouldn't compare it to anyone else's situation." Jamie shrugged and patted the spot next to him on the bed. Jack sighed before doing what was requested of him and then wrapped his arms around the other boy.

"Yeah. You're right." He sighed again and buried his nose in his hair. "You know, you're the best."

"I know." Jamie laughed a little and hugged Jack back.

They sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes before Jamie pulled them both backwards onto the bed and squeezed in an extra bit of a hug before letting go. They both stared at the ceiling, both thinking about different things, and both unsure of where to go from there. Jack knew that he had to get home before eleven, but he had two hours before that became a glaring reality. He just wanted to make the most of it before facing home and then school the next day. Which was also the beginning of the new semester.

"Oh, how did your finals go?" Jack asked without moving from his comfortable position.

"Finals? Kicked their stupid papery asses."

Jack laughed and kissed the side of his head.

"Very nice."

"What about you?"

"I think I did alright. But we'll find out in a week. Damn report cards."

"I have faith in your test taking skills."

"It's not only that. It's having faith in my making up a whole semester skills."

"Jack, I'd like to believe you're over exaggerating."

"I'm exaggerating. But only a little."

Jamie inhaled a deep breath through his nose before propping himself on an elbow to look at Jack, who was closing his eyes, already prepared for the education speech.

"Obviously it's too late to be upset with you for putting off school work for last semester. But Jack, please, could you promise that you'll try from here on out?"

"I've _been_ trying. And I'm planning on continuing that." Jack leaned in to kiss Jamie before sitting up. "I'm finally thinking about my future again."

"Good, that's good. Good. Good stuff." Jamie followed Jack in sitting up. "I am pleased to hear that."

Jack laughed a bit at Jamie's phrasing.

Though he was nervous about his ability in keeping up with his word, Jack knew that this semester would be far better than the ones in the last few years.

The next day Jack woke up at six o'clock, just like he had done countless days before, but with a different feeling in his gut. It was like this was his first day at school, with new pencils, fresh paper, and the nervous excitement to learn new things. He didn't know whether or not that was a good feeling, but nevertheless, he got out of bed, took a shower, and put on his clothes like every other day. He gathered his things in his bag before stopping at his desk and opening the drawer. It wasn't until after he picked up his cigarettes that he realized he couldn't be doing that at school any longer. With a sigh, he put them back in and then slid the drawer shut.

His schedule hadn't changed much besides it just rearranging slightly with his art classes turning into advanced ones instead of intermediate and a P.E. class being put into the mix. But this still meant a few beginning of the new class speeches that he sort of payed attention to. His other classes went along such as they were the week before, and by lunch time, which thankfully stayed the same as Jamie's, he was feeling slightly left behind but trucking along.

"So how's it going so far?" Jamie asked as they sat down.

Jack shrugged and picked up his bag from off the floor. "It's going alright. Just as long as I keep focused, I think it'll go by fine. And then we'll be seniors." He smiled at the thought.

"I feel like I just started high school. We're getting mighty old, aren't we?"

"Says the sixteen year old".

"Hey, it's not my fault I was born in the summer. It's a curse really." Jamie gave Jack a sideways look before breaking into a smile.

"Curse shmerse." Jack smiled back at him.

"Uh, so, are you going with us to look at the new dog?"

"I really wish I could," Jack sighed and propped his chin on his hands, "but I have to stay home tonight. My parents are being strangely cryptic about it."

"That sounds... stressful." Jamie said hesitantly.

"Yeah, I'm a little nervous about it." Jack looked down and shrugged one elbow. "But it's okay."

"Well good luck with that."

"Yeah, I'll need it." Jack gave him a small smile.

After the last bell rang, Jack walked home, hoping to prolong the moment between possible conflicts that he could have when he walked through the front door and being safely away from them. But he eventually started walking up to his house, and opened the door, and hung up his bag on the peg on the wall and walked into the living room where, thankfully, his parents weren't sitting like in the movies with their arms crossed.

But surprisingly, his Uncle North was sitting on the couch with a cookie being stuffed in his mouth and a glass of milk on the table beside him.

"Jackie!" His uncle threw up his arms and broke out into a big grin before jumping up and giving him a big idea. "It is good to see you!"

Jack let out a little surprised laugh before returning the hug. "W-what are you doing here?"

"Are you not glad to see me? I am hurt!" Uncle North let out a booming laugh.

"No, no, I'm happy to see you. I'm just confused."

North rubbed the top of his nephew's head, messing up his already unruly hair, and crossed his giant arms, showing off his tattoos.

"I have not forgot your birthday, Little Jackie."

"My birthday was weeks ago."

"And you see, I have not forgot!" His uncle gave him a big smile before putting his arm on his shoulder. "Christmas time is most busy time. But now I am here." He started to guide him outside and around to the side of his house where the garage was.

"Uh, well, you didn't have to get me anything, really."

"But I must. And here we are." He gestured with both hands to the open garage, which had a bright red convertible in it.

"Oh my... Are you... Are you giving me your car?" Jack stared wide eyed at his Uncle's prized cherry red beauty. This was unbelievable. That thing was immaculate!

North busted up laughing, holding his belly and practically bent over with tears. After a few awkward minutes, he stood up fully and wiped some moisture from his eyes.

"Oh, that was good. Very good. I kid." He turned him so he was facing across the street. "That is new car. I hope you like."

It wasn't a nice slick convertible, but it was a pretty nice car. The coloring was a perfect icy blue, which Jack would prefer any day over red, and though he could tell it wasn't a brand new car, it was in very decent shape.

"How do you like first car?"

"Wow, it's, wow." Jack broke out in a huge grin. "It's perfect! You didn't have to do this, really. Wow."

"It is birthday and Christmas gift from Bunny and I."

"Thank you so much." He turned around and gave his uncle a gigantic hug, thanking him even more. He chuckled his almost Santa like chuckle and patted his nephew on the shoulder.

"I am glad you like."

"_Love_. I love it."

"Good, good. How about you give it ride around, yeah?"

"Heck yeah." Jack happily accepted the keys from North and practically ran over to his new car.

"Take your time! I will be here for another day. Have fun." North waved him away with a big cheeky smile and Jack yelled another thank you before slipping in and turning the ignition on.

Jack was definitely going to have fun with this new present.

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**I thought I should add this, North's car was suppose to be his sleigh and Jack's car's suppose to be like the old wind he uses to fly, haha. I thought it was kind of clever.**


End file.
